Today, it dawned on me that the most romantic thing my husband has done in the last three years, was a put a wedding ring on his xbox avatar. FML

by browniepoints / 02/06/2010 at 7:09pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, my mom and I went to the mall to look for some boxer briefs. While looking, I saw two girls I knew from school, so I went over to say hello. At least, that was my plan, but my mom screamed, "Look! These have dinosaurs on them!" They left the store giggling. FML

by dinosaurboy / 02/06/2010 at 3:01pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was backing out of the my work's parking lot, I hit my boss' truck. While he was in it. FML

by Anonymous / 02/06/2010 at 2:50pm / United States (Texas) / Transportation

Today, I was feeling hungry, so I went to the kitchen to get a bowl of cereal. I found hundreds of weevils festering in my Lucky Charms. FML

by annony-moose / 02/06/2010 at 1:48pm / Miscellaneous

Today, there was a new and extremely attractive girl at youth group, so I decided to introduce myself. Her reply was, "Wow, I've always wanted to meet a gay guy!" FML

by Richard / 02/06/2010 at 1:39pm / Love

Today, my boyfriend of two years said he would finally take me somewhere romantic. I spent my day at a Star Wars convention. FML

by cherrycokeee / 02/06/2010 at 1:29pm / Love

Today, my mother told me that the carbon-monoxide alarm went off last night, but since she didn't smell any gas, she decided to just remove the batteries and go back to bed. I had to explain to her that you can't smell carbon monoxide, and that we could have died in our sleep. FML

by Kelso / 02/06/2010 at 1:22pm / United States / Miscellaneous

water4life's comment : she needs to be slapped

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Today, I took my cat to the vet. He said he felt a strange lump that could be serious. I got really upset and picked her up, crying. The vet then told me I had to put her down. Absolutely devastated by having to euthanize my cat, I passed out. He meant I had to put her back on the table. FML

by sadcat / 02/06/2010 at 10:19am / United States (New Hampshire) / Animals

Today, I received our gas bill for about £200. My flatmate felt that this was extortionate and therefore phoned up our gas company and angrily told them to recalculate the bill. They did. We now owe £300. FML

by Anonymous / 02/06/2010 at 7:40am / United Kingdom (Newcastle upon Tyne) / Transportation

Today, we had a NAT for our preparation for college. I did quite well and knew most of the answers. When I turned mine in, I realised I forgot to write my name. The proctor doesn't allow giving back test papers after it is turned in. And no, I can't retake it. FML

by stupidupid / 02/06/2010 at 7:35am / Philippines (Manila) / Miscellaneous

Today, I started a new job, it was going well until I was asked to stand up and be introduced to a company director. I had a hard on. FML

by Bacular / 02/06/2010 at 4:29am / United Kingdom (London) / Intimacy

Today, I was talking to a female friend online. She was typing out a story bit by bit about how awful she was feeling after being teased. I was responding with "So, so true" but because of my slow typing it appeared after she wrote, "Doesn't help being fat." FML

by Oops / 02/06/2010 at 3:17am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, my little sister asked me what she would look like when she got older. I told her that she would probably look a lot like me. She started to cry. FML

by Misty3242 / 02/06/2010 at 3:15am / United States (California) / Kids