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AviKerensky's comment : Tell him that snot the way to use that thing.

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Today, I keep getting calls from companies that I applied to for interviews. The thing is, I moved 1,000 miles away a week ago because I couldn't find a job. FML

#21431867
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25180) - you deserved it (2916)

On 06/25/2015 at 4:59pm - work - by missmolliss (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went to visit my mother after many years. Her hoarding has gotten so bad that now the house is entirely filled with junk and garbage, and she is camping out in the jungle of a backyard, cooking on a cauldron over a fire and shitting in the compost pile, with no working heat or water. FML

#21431843
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25893) - you deserved it (2066)

On 06/25/2015 at 4:03pm - misc - by childofcrazy (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

MyNameIsLaughter's comment : Get her some help maybe?

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Today, my dad got so drunk that I had to drive him home. He kept yelling at me to not speed, saying I was going too fast and that there were too many bumps on the road. I hadn't even started the car yet. FML

2nd's comment : I wonder what his reaction was when you were actually driving.

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Today, the new girl told me that a guy at the back of the class was being creepy. I looked over and saw him picking his nose and flinging boogers at the girls sitting in the front. That guy is my boyfriend. FML

#21431826
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26201) - you deserved it (5919)

On 06/25/2015 at 3:16pm - misc - by sweetsixteenyay - United Kingdom (Caerphilly)

Today, I was notified I'm being discharged after 2 weeks because my employers don't have the time to train me at my first real job in 6 years. FML

#21431811
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23184) - you deserved it (1638)

On 06/25/2015 at 2:29pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex quite aggressively. Towards the end, he lifted his hips off the bed and then headbutted me in the nose. The only thing that came today was blood all over my new bra. FML

Today, I got into a fight with my parents when they called me a bad driver. Imagine their smugness when I had to call them two hours later and tell them that I drove into a pole. FML

#21431656
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16195) - you deserved it (21951)

On 06/25/2015 at 6:10am - misc - by ApparentlyBadDriver - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, I was complimented on my improved performance over the last 3 months. My boss said he doesn't know what I've done to improve, but to keep it up. I'd only started looking for another job, and stopped giving a shit. FML

#21431603
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24319) - you deserved it (1951)

On 06/25/2015 at 3:06am - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I walked in on a raccoon viciously tearing apart a giant bag of dog food, not five feet away from my sleeping dog. FML

#21431556
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23059) - you deserved it (1653)

On 06/25/2015 at 1:30am - animals - by wtfkasey - Canada (Ontario)

Today, as I was about to orgasm while my boyfriend was giving me oral sex, I tightened my grip on his hair and began shouting his name. He stopped, looked up at me, and said, "What?" FML

#21431510
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27232) - you deserved it (3615)

On 06/24/2015 at 11:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was informed, after being broken up with, that my girlfriend's father only set her up with me so that she would have more motivation to shower on a regular basis. He actually yelled at me for being broken up with. FML

#21431508
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23030) - you deserved it (1609)

On 06/24/2015 at 11:54pm - love - by Anonymouss (man) - United States

Today, I submitted a poem for my English class. I had fun writing it, so I wrote a second which was not nearly as good. My procrastinator of a friend never did his, so I gave him my extra poem. Mine was given a 75% while "his" received a 93%. FML

#21431507
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22373) - you deserved it (8107)

On 06/24/2015 at 11:49pm - misc - by WhyIHateTeachers - United States (Florida)



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