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Today, whilst vacuuming, I stupidly decided to vacuum the bathroom drain to see what would happen. Turns out it will cause stinking septic water to get sucked into the machine and spew all over the walls, ceiling and vanity. It also causes the vacuum cleaner to stop working. FML

#21445713
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9595) - you deserved it (33881)

On 07/22/2015 at 10:32pm - misc - by sucked_in - Australia (Western Australia)

coraline123c's comment : I think you need an adult

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Today, my mom told me that she heard me and my best friend in my room grunting and talking about how hard we were. She said she loved me and accepted me no matter what. Thanks mom, but we were working out. FML

#21445547
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24283) - you deserved it (4894)

On 07/22/2015 at 4:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

taterrtots's comment : at least she didn't give you a hard time about it. wink

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Today, on the bus, my blood sugar level got too low and I passed out. When I came to, the woman next to me was hitting me, saying she needed to get off and that she didn't have time for my "stupid fucking prank". FML

#21445474
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28023) - you deserved it (1832)

On 07/22/2015 at 1:35pm - health - by qhorin halflung (woman) -

_guy_j's comment : How inconsiderate of her. I would've thought someone else on the bus would've helped you out though.

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Today, I was taking a piss at a urinal when a fly started harassing me. I got so annoyed, I tried to swat it. Didn't go too well. I ended up losing control of my stream, soaking the guy beside me. He busted my face in. FML

#21445449
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16087) - you deserved it (23589)

On 07/22/2015 at 12:21pm - health - by Anonypiss (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while on my Dad's computer, I looked through the browser history to find the name of a website I'd visited on it the other day. I soon found out he watches a staggering amount of downright frightening incest porn. I'm disturbed on so many levels. FML

#21445392
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25599) - you deserved it (3117)

On 07/22/2015 at 7:52am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was reading a picture storybook to a kindergarten kid. She could pronounce more words than me, and corrected me. I'm about triple her age. FML

#21445328
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14103) - you deserved it (23868)

On 07/22/2015 at 2:32am - kids - by thebiteof87 - Australia (Victoria)

Today, a girl with a picture of One Direction as her desktop asked if I wanted to partner with her on a 70% law assignment. Two hours after saying no, I found out that she's a legal genius with a guaranteed job in the field and a near perfect GPA. FML

#21445322
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10800) - you deserved it (46596)

On 07/22/2015 at 2:18am - work - by Anonymous -

Today, a customer complained he never got his sandwich, even though I put it in the oven, dressed it up and served it to him. When I went to clear his table off, I saw the sandwich basket. We had to give him his money back. FML

#21445292
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24453) - you deserved it (1950)

On 07/22/2015 at 12:58am - kids - by okay - United States (Georgia)

Today, while working security at my job, for the second time, a man with Down's Syndrome entered the store, went to one of the demo computers, opened YouTube, pulled up a video of oiled women wrestling and jerked off. There is no protocol in the handbook for how to deal with this scenario. FML

Today, I was working at the local grocery store and a customer of mine, who had only bought two granola bars and was holding up my line, tried to convert me to Christianity. Out of all the people to target, she chose the shy atheist who just wanted to do her minimum wage job in peace. FML

#21445275
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24454) - you deserved it (2614)

On 07/22/2015 at 12:20am - work - by Quortney - United States

Today, I had to explain to my boss that DVI ports are not the same as HDMI ports. When I showed him the HDMI cable, he said, "Oh! You mean USB!" He's an engineering manager. FML

#21445231
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23674) - you deserved it (1469)

On 07/21/2015 at 11:02pm - work - by geek (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my brother told me to, "Stop bitching and get over it" after I complained of pain from my stomach after invasive surgery. This from the guy who spends multiple hours a day playing Halo and whining about the stupid ways he got killed. FML

#21445196
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22802) - you deserved it (1678)

On 07/21/2015 at 9:35pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was trying to work out, and couldn't even complete an exercise regime meant for 50-year-olds. I'm 24. FML

#21445022
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22255) - you deserved it (7442)

On 07/21/2015 at 1:50pm - health - by Anonymous - India (Karnataka)



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