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Today, my roommate wants to kick me out because I can't afford to pay my share of the rent this month. I couldn't afford to, because I had to pay for repairs to my car after my roommate got drunk, stole my keys, and crashed it into a street light. FML

#21394027
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36031) - you deserved it (2589)

On 04/15/2015 at 10:32am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

grajax's comment : Shouldn't you have made him pay for the car?

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Today, my dad tricked the local biker gang into believing he's actually part of the Russian mob. FML

garf3265's comment : that's kind of impressive

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Pingvinai's comment : Buy the size you have, not the size you want.

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Today, my 3-year-old broke his glasses, clogged the toilet with Hot Wheel cars, and covered the whole house with Cheerios. All in a matter of roughly 6 minutes while I was putting laundry away. FML

#21393865
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29701) - you deserved it (3326)

On 04/15/2015 at 12:17am - kids - by mommylife (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got a massage. Just as I was starting to relax, the massage therapist drooled on my face. FML

#21393655
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28074) - you deserved it (1823)

On 04/14/2015 at 5:50pm - misc - by spitty (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I took my 5-year-old daughter to the play place at McDonalds but I had to keep her busy, instead of letting her play. A mom was teaching her 3-year-old daughter how to pole dance, using the play place's poles. FML

#21393641
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28221) - you deserved it (2211)

On 04/14/2015 at 5:17pm - kids - by Pandistoteles - United States

Today, my sister and I heard back from a job we both applied to. I had used the knowledge from my MBA degree to write a six-page essay for the application, while she just copied and pasted hers from a random website. Guess who got the job. FML

#21393558
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33801) - you deserved it (3224)

On 04/14/2015 at 2:15pm - work - by Anyonexx0 - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, my 13-year-old sister told me that she wants to get pregnant soon to stop her periods for a while. I can't believe we're related. FML

#21393492
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30860) - you deserved it (2405)

On 04/14/2015 at 11:49am - health - by TheGoodSister - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I decided to be healthy and make a fresh juice out of carrots and apples. Apparently, something had gone bad and now my asshole feels like a bomb just went off inside it. Good start to a healthy lifestyle. FML

#21393477
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25101) - you deserved it (3561)

On 04/14/2015 at 11:08am - health - by howaboutthemcarrots - Finland (Southern Finland)

Today, my supervisor forced me to bring the image of a failed simulation to the group meeting, because he thought it looked funny. So did the others and it's now going on our webpage. I have to provide a scientific description of how I made a mistake in my code. FML

#21393415
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23693) - you deserved it (2447)

On 04/14/2015 at 7:50am - work - by OptMouse (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I went to feed my neighbors' chickens while they were on vacation. I noticed the TV on inside, so I peeked in to see if the place was being messed with. Guess who found the neighbor home early, fully naked, and jerking off. FML

#21393386
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29617) - you deserved it (3225)

On 04/14/2015 at 4:33am - intimacy - by Lebac - United States (Washington)

Today, my husband of 3 weeks told me he doesn't want to be married anymore because I suggested getting a joint bank account. FML

#21393373
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27701) - you deserved it (3767)

On 04/14/2015 at 3:21am - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, I thought my dad was finally showing interest in the business I started last year when he asked about my next event. Nope, he just wanted to know if I would hire his step-granddaughter. Her first question: "So, I won't have to do any like, real work right?" Gee, thanks Dad. FML

#21393221
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25989) - you deserved it (1890)

On 04/13/2015 at 9:50pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)



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