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Today, I went to an ATM intending to withdraw $150. I approached the machine, inserted my card, typed in my pin and followed the prompts. When my card came out, I removed it, put it in my pocket and drove off. FML

oloofe's comment : Well you made some random persons day thats for sure

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Today, I was at a family gathering with my boyfriend. Jokingly, my grandmother swatted my butt to get me to move. Out of habit, I moaned quite loudly. FML

#21358985
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16966) - you deserved it (29112)

On 02/19/2015 at 12:45am - intimacy - by heymacie (woman) - United States (Texas)

fleur_de_fevrier's comment : Just shows that faking will bite you in the ass eventually.

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Today, while working at my salon, I was cutting an older gentleman's hair. When he got up to leave, everyone noticed he had clearly pissed his pants. I felt bad for him until he laughed and said, "Here's your tip, have fun cleaning that up." FML

#21358633
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30986) - you deserved it (2056)

On 02/18/2015 at 2:48pm - work - by breyn (woman) - United States

MrSarary's comment : Yeah well guess who's getting a bad hair cut next time he comes in? FYL indeed OP.

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Today, I tried to blackmail my douchebag boss for a raise, since I had ample proof that he's screwing a co-worker. Turns out he and his wife are in an open relationship, and HR doesn't give a damn about office romances. Now I have to quit or deal with the most hostile work environment ever. FML

#21358578
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13432) - you deserved it (55815)

On 02/18/2015 at 1:06pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Norfolk)

Today, my dad still refuses to repay the loan I gave him. I've just barely managed to pay my bills, and I'm now so poor that I'll have to survive the next 3 days until my next paycheck by eating the only thing left in my fridge: a jar of cheese whiz. FML

#21358559
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31915) - you deserved it (2974)

On 02/18/2015 at 12:17pm - money - by janused (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I pulled a muscle in my right shoulder and can barely move my arm. My friends keep asking if I'm sure it wasn't from jerking off too much. Truth is, I pulled it by playing on my computer too much. FML

Today, after being with the company for over 3 years, I realised nobody really knows my name. This was after my boss was walking around a new staff member and couldn't introduce me. Neither could my colleague, who's been sitting next to me for the last 6 months. FML

#21358494
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31112) - you deserved it (3400)

On 02/18/2015 at 7:35am - work - by lonergirl - Australia

Today, a photo of my friends and me was posted in our college group. I didn't notice my legs looked enormous until my friend pointed it out. Her comment got 50 likes. FML

#21358355
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28039) - you deserved it (2805)

On 02/17/2015 at 11:22pm - misc - by ImNotFat - New Zealand

Today, I told my cousin that I would gladly help him through the loss of my aunt. That is until he started flirting with me. FML

#21358332
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28909) - you deserved it (2253)

On 02/17/2015 at 11:02pm - misc - by whateven333 (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out that my boyfriend wasn't really bedridden sick on Valentine's Day. A Super Smash Bros game date with his friends was just more important. FML

#21358314
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27945) - you deserved it (4812)

On 02/17/2015 at 10:40pm - love - by superscript - United States (Washington)

Today, I went to my son's school soccer game. Unfortunately, I couldn't get excited about it because my idiot son kept diving the moment anyone so much as breathed on him. It eventually earned him a penalty shot that won him the game. I was so ashamed, I snuck out to avoid being seen with him. FML

#21358080
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29837) - you deserved it (8955)

On 02/17/2015 at 3:02pm - kids - by Clive81 (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I took my boyfriend to a family dinner. Not an hour later, I walked in on my sister giving him a handjob in her room. And what's worse, my first reaction was just to wonder why he'd bother cheating on me for just a handjob. FML

#21358057
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37103) - you deserved it (3057)

On 02/17/2015 at 2:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



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Friday 27 February 2015

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