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Today, I put in an application to my local market for a job that I desperately needed. I was talking to the manager, he seemed pleased with my application and said he'll call me. As he walks into his private office, I hear the sound of a paper shredder. FML

#6877419
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27342) - you deserved it (2463)

On 12/22/2009 at 12:45am - work - by TheJuggla17 (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out where all my expensive bras and panties have been disappearing to. Apparently, while I'm at work, my fifteen year-old son's girlfriend has been stealing them after they have sex in my bed. FML

#6874607
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28167) - you deserved it (3270)

On 12/21/2009 at 10:28pm - intimacy - by Secretisout (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I asked my girlfriend what she thought of us getting married some day. She said she wasn't sure about me yet and that we may want to go in different directions soon. We've been dating for three years and I had the ring in my pocket at the moment. FML

#6873751
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41256) - you deserved it (3683)

On 12/21/2009 at 9:47pm - love - by chao (man) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, my mom and I had to shovel our driveway after an epic snowstorm that left us with 22 inches of snow. We only needed to dig out my mom's car and not mine. After we did all that work and shoveled all the snow onto the side where my car was we found out my mom had a flat tire. FML

#6872316
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26190) - you deserved it (3171)

On 12/21/2009 at 8:48pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got fed up with the amount of hair on my feet, so I went to get my foot hair waxed off. When I removed my socks, the waxer laughed the amount of foot hair. I'm a 18 year old female and it appears I have feet that were last seen on Big Foot. FML

#6872030
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27401) - you deserved it (3922)

On 12/21/2009 at 8:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I took the train home. When seated, I suddenly noticed something wet on my seat. Without looking, I thought it was water since it was snowing outside. Guess again. It was vomit. FML

#6868813
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27102) - you deserved it (6844)

On 12/21/2009 at 5:36pm - misc - by herzausstein (man) - Belgium (Limburg)

Today, I had given up on finding my makeup bag with cell phone and iPod my mom had bought for me recently. So I went to art to join the group of girls with whom I share the back art studio of my school. One of them was talking about how she'd ripped off some bitch's stuff, and she held up my bag. FML

#6867947
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38498) - you deserved it (2925)

On 12/21/2009 at 4:48pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

AcesAndEights's comment : so.... kick her in the face and take it back? I hope you didn't just stand there

See all the comments →

Today, I was at a family party and everyone was seeing my new glasses for the first time. My 48 year old uncle told me that I look like a hot librarian and then grabbed my ass. He was still sober. FML

#6865964
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36473) - you deserved it (2800)

On 12/21/2009 at 2:30pm - misc - by frapples1 (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was hanging out with my ex's new girlfriend. I found out he was dating us both at the same time and was comparing between us. That is why he broke up with me two years ago and is still with her ever since. FML

#6865910
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24803) - you deserved it (3624)

On 12/21/2009 at 2:26pm - misc - by fml333 (woman) - Saudi Arabia

Today, my boyfriend decided to give me my Christmas present early because he's going to his grandparents' house for Christmas and won't see me. I was excited, until I unwrapped a sweater that I left there a month ago. FML

#6865867
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28455) - you deserved it (2856)

On 12/21/2009 at 2:23pm - love - by anonymous - United States

Today, I updated my Facebook status to "It should probably be called Unplanned Parenthood." My cousin, seeing the status, failed to pick up on the sarcastic humor. She called all my family members and tell them that I was pregnant. Including my husband in Iraq. FML

#6864986
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32089) - you deserved it (13375)

On 12/21/2009 at 1:12pm - misc - by notpregnant (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years announced that he is not ready for marriage, and won’t be for 'at least' another 2 years. Of course he waited to tell me this 2 days after he had proposed to me in front of hundreds of people, I said yes, and we announced it to all our family members and friends. FML

#6863631
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31235) - you deserved it (2696)

On 12/21/2009 at 11:15am - love - by Agata (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I got a call from my local hospital's emergency room, stating my wife was in labour. My wife and I split years ago, but just haven't divorced. She is telling everyone I am the baby's father, my current girlfriend is 7 months pregnant with my child. FML

#6863042
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26029) - you deserved it (9388)

On 12/21/2009 at 10:23am - intimacy - by johnG (man) - Canada (Ontario)

InstaKarma's comment : Really dude? Way to go on procrastinating the divorce. Procrastination is a lot like masturbation. It may feel good at the time, but in the end you will have just fucked yourself. YDI for procrastinating AND getting another woman pregnant while you're at it. Moron.

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