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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today mah dad thought it'd be funny to putted an Edward Cullen cutout behind mah car as I backed it out the garage to see mah reaction. Oh it was funny alright except I was so scared that when I saw him through the mirror I reacted by stepping on the gas. We now have half a garage door. mega FML

#7605430
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22578) - you deserved it (7737)

On 01/27/2010 at 1:21am - misc - by garage - Sent from mobile version

Today , mah boyfriend's ex-wife facebooked me to inform me that they were still married an he was still sleeping with her. I've been living with him 4 the past month. mega FML

#7605388
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30091) - you deserved it (3829)

On 01/27/2010 at 1:18am - love - by LivingInSin (woman) - United States (Texas)

today I checkd my university financial account to discover I owd them over $1000. The reason? They had apparently given me too much money when I applid for a loan an now want it back. Oh , an I spent my loan money on books an a laptop for school. FML

#7604167
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23940) - you deserved it (2832)

On 01/27/2010 at 12:25am - money - by boned (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, at mah school, the student council is trying to raise $5000 fir Haiti . They r doing so by playing the song from High School Musical in the hallways and cafeteria everyday until they get the money . FML

#7603599
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38320) - you deserved it (3909)

On 01/27/2010 at 12:07am - misc - by evil - United States (South Carolina)

TADAY MY BEST FRIEND PLANNED A BIRTDAY PARTY FIR ME AT TE LOCAL MEXICAN RESTAURANT. NO ONE SOWED UP. WE TOLD TE MEXICAN WAITER TERE WOULD BE 18 ARRIVING. TWO OURS LATER E BROUGT ME FREE ICE CREAM. EVEN TE NON-ENGLIS SPEAKING WAITERS KNEW I WAS A LOSER. FML

#7600805
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30006) - you deserved it (3432)

On 01/26/2010 at 10:31pm - misc - by Candace - United States

Today, I found out mah girlfriend and her best friend compare the dumps they take to common transportation. They comment about it on each others facebook page. My girlfriend's last one was apparently a 'coach bus'. FML

#7600232
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20659) - you deserved it (3272)

On 01/26/2010 at 10:14pm - health - by poops - United States

TODAY... I WAS HAVING SEX WITH A GIRL WHEN HER PARENTS DECIDED TO COME HOME EARLY. TRYING TO RUN OUT THE BACK DOOR I FELL AN BROKE MY ANKLE. NOT ONLY DID HER FORMER NAVY SEAL FATHER FIND OUT I WAS BANGING HIS LITTLE PRINCESS... HE DROVE ME TO THE ER... ALONE. FML

#7598826
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11730) - you deserved it (25147)

On 01/26/2010 at 9:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today... some girl from Colorado called me. She knew my name. My Facebook. I had no idea how she got my number. She then asks me out. I say "sure" sarcastically. She then calls my girlfriend... who also lives in Colorado. Our relationship is now over. FML

#7598388
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10979) - you deserved it (33695)

On 01/26/2010 at 9:12pm - love - by Aaron (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my grandpa, a married ig scool teacer, got arrested fir aving an inappropriate relationsip wit a female student. Hereing te news, I called my grandma crying. Not only is e most likely going to jail, looool but in seven monts I will ave a new aunt wo is eigteen yeres younger tan me. FML

#7594942
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34613) - you deserved it (2093)

On 01/26/2010 at 7:09pm - misc - by newniece (woman) - United States (Ohio)

I FOUND OUT MA BANK ACCOUNT WAS IN TE NEGATIVE CUZ MA WORK GAVE ME A CECK TAT DIDN'T CLEAR. I WENT TO MA BANK TO GET A STATEMENT OF CARGE SO MA JOB COULD REIMBURSE ME. TEY TOLD ME REQUESTING A STATEMENT COSTS 8 DOLLARS,IC I DON'T AVE CUZ MA ACCOUNT IS IN TE NEGATIVE. FML

#7591885
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25665) - you deserved it (2327)

On 01/26/2010 at 4:33pm - money - by tinaburrito - Sent from mobile version

Today, my parents got me a new computer for my brthday. They also took the liberty of throwing out my old computer, with 8 years of photos, videos, music, documents, emails, an bookmarks on it. But that's okay, I had a backup. They threw that out too. FML

#7591747
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36038) - you deserved it (2163)

On 01/26/2010 at 4:25pm - misc - by computergeek (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today... after wonderingy I didn't receive a grade for a summer course I took in 2007... I realized tat I gave te professor te wrong student ID number. Someone else received credit. I've been waiting on tis grade for 8 monts in order to graduate. FML

#7589933
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13209) - you deserved it (27441)

On 01/26/2010 at 2:03pm - misc - by optimist - United States (California)



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