Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I realized if you leave a can of soda in parked car during a heatwave it will explode all over everything. My car is like a human glue trap. FML

#11895000
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20805) - you deserved it (25991)

On 07/15/2010 at 5:31am - misc - by bigmikenyc - United States

Today, I was on webcam for the first time with a guy I've been texting for a while. Trying to show off my guitar skills, I lean down to pick it up and fell on my face. FML

#11894871
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13459) - you deserved it (26264)

On 07/15/2010 at 5:17am - misc - by ditsy (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend woke up wheezing terribly, aching, and sneezing. He's allergic to cats. I have 2 and they are my babies. He gave me an ultimatum, him or the cats. I haven't figured out how I'm going to tell him that I choose the cats. FML

#11892706
460 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20403) - you deserved it (62306)

On 07/15/2010 at 2:53am - love - by BambooLove (woman) - United States

nwtngrl820's comment : tell him to get allergy medicine then u can have both

See all the comments →

Today, I hired somebody to send me love letters. I'm that lonely. FML

#11890639
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37484) - you deserved it (19154)

On 07/15/2010 at 1:19am - love - by lonely (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I ran into my boyfriend. The same guy that told me he was still in Florida with his family. FML

#11889011
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39853) - you deserved it (3672)

On 07/15/2010 at 12:12am - love - by sunkissedberries - United States

Today, I bought an "I love my boyfriend" t-shirt so people wouldn't think I'm single. I'm very single. FML

#11886380
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15600) - you deserved it (37371)

On 07/14/2010 at 10:37pm - love - by readytomingle (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I ran over a newspaper with the lawnmower, instantly volunteering myself to pick up confetti for hours. FML

#11875155
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16295) - you deserved it (25842)

On 07/14/2010 at 12:47pm - misc - by rofld (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I decided to buy my Chinese Studies professor a gift from Taiwan. So I bought her a mini-Taiwanese passport that said "Republic of China" on it. As it turns out, it was actually a two-pack of travel condoms. FML

#11873804
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29176) - you deserved it (20097)

On 07/14/2010 at 11:17am - intimacy - by safetyfirst (man) - Taiwan (T'ai-pei)

Today, I was at a friend's house. She has one of those automatic air fresheners, and I was amazed when it went off. To get a better look at it, I got real close to it. I saw a button and pressed it. The air freshener went off again, spraying nothing but my eye. FML

#11867771
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7432) - you deserved it (60709)

On 07/14/2010 at 2:14am - misc - by Eyefreshener (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I made brownies for my co-workers. My boss called me into his office, and I though he was going to compliment me on the baking. Instead, he talked about how his 5-year-old daughter can make brownies better than me. FML

#11867757
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33095) - you deserved it (5892)

On 07/14/2010 at 2:14am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend told me that we should take a break from our relationship, because it'd be best for the both of us. Later, I found out that she really meant it'd be best for her and her new boyfriend. FML

#11866175
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39380) - you deserved it (3385)

On 07/14/2010 at 1:08am - love - by Depressed (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I've recently gained weight so I bought an exercise video. I started it right away in my room on the top floor. My younger sister screamed and ran outside a few minutes later. She thought it was an earthquake. FML

#11865183
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36715) - you deserved it (9746)

On 07/14/2010 at 12:32am - health - by sarah - United States

Today, I decided not to go on Facebook so people would actually think that I have a life. FML

#11864546
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14580) - you deserved it (29268)

On 07/14/2010 at 12:09am - misc - by No.Life. - United States (Vermont)



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