Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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Today, I discovered that the pain I've had for the past couple of weeks was actually due to a broken collar bone. Now work won't pay for the treatment I need because I continued to work despite the pain. FML

#21518327
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20617) - you deserved it (1998)

On 01/22/2016 at 8:43pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (New Brunswick)

knight2109's comment : Don't Canadians usually go on about their free healthcare?

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Today, I accidentally stood up my first date ever. How? I spent all of last night cleaning my parents' house for extra spending money to make sure the date went perfect, but I ended up sleeping through the alarm as well. FML

#21518238
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20398) - you deserved it (3166)

On 01/22/2016 at 4:28pm - love - by OhNo - United States (California)

JewKnowIt's comment : Maybe if you explain it and schedule another one she'll understand? That's happened to me before

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Today, my girlfriend read an FML by some guy about fight he had with his nutjob of a girlfriend. It was so bizarrely similar to a fight we had recently that she accused me of not having any balls and bitching about her to strangers. It wasn't even my story. FML

#21518234
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22614) - you deserved it (1758)

On 01/22/2016 at 3:55pm - love - by believe me now?? (man) - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)

chevygirl23's comment : And now she'll bitch at your for this one

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Today, my shitburglar of an ex asked me to take him back. He said dumping me was a huge mistake. He dumped me because I was bed-ridden for several weeks and was in no condition to have sex. If his social media is anything to go by, he only wants me back because he couldn't get laid elsewhere. FML

#21518208
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20508) - you deserved it (1310)

On 01/22/2016 at 2:31pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I got locked out of my house. After trying unsuccessfully to jimmy the lock, I managed to climb in through the kitchen window. I soon found out I had an effect on the door after all; it won't open at all any more, even with the right key. FML

#21518195
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15749) - you deserved it (5089)

On 01/22/2016 at 2:00pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, one of my professors left a cabinet door open whilst teaching class. The compulsion to get up and close it was so strong that I could barely concentrate on what was being taught. FML

Today, the company I work for lost 3-weeks worth of time sheets, so we have to fill them all out again. I don't remember what I did yesterday, let alone three weeks ago. That's why I religiously fill out the time sheets in the first place. FML

#21518159
39 comments

Today, my parents installed spyware on my computer after reading an article about teens ordering drugs from the deep web. Now I'm too afraid to watch porn because I don't want my parents to know when I'm jacking off. FML

Today, my new girlfriend's father made good on his "What you do to her I do to you" threat when he took me out for drinks and then drunkenly hit on me. FML

#21518118
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20749) - you deserved it (3018)

On 01/22/2016 at 7:50am - misc - by whattheactualfuck (man) - South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal)

Today, my pubic hairs were poking into my wang, I went to scratch it. Something bit my hand. FML

#21518044
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19775) - you deserved it (7408)

On 01/22/2016 at 12:47am - animals - by swag papi - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my 17 year old told me he wanted to pursue a career in art. Knowing he's extremely talented at drawing, I congratulated him and told him to pursue that dream. A few hours later I learn that he's been arrested for spray painting graffiti dicks all over a school wall. Well, he's famous now. FML

#21517961
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21509) - you deserved it (2022)

On 01/21/2016 at 9:21pm - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I met up with my dad for the first time in 7 years. We planned to go to a nice restaurant but he changed the place we were going to, to Chuck E. Cheese. I'm 18 years old. I waited an hour for him to show up. I then ended up babysitting his daughter the whole time. FML

#21517950
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21512) - you deserved it (1403)

On 01/21/2016 at 8:55pm - kids - by anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, my eldest daughter announced she was getting divorced. She never even told me she was married. FML

#21518068
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20944) - you deserved it (2009) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/21/2016 at 7:11pm - love - by Kimel - France (Franche-Comte)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

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  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

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