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Today, I was at work copying some papers. The copier is below a shelf with lots of paper and signage, which suddenly flew off the hinge and hit me in the head as well as the copier. My boss ran in, asking, "Is the copier okay?" FML

#21356994
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25366) - you deserved it (1891)

On 02/15/2015 at 10:25pm - work - by LP - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I threw up on a police officer who was trying to do a random breath test. I wasn't drunk or hungover. I'm pregnant and suffering morning sickness. FML

#21356993
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31969) - you deserved it (2024)

On 02/15/2015 at 10:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

makkarari's comment : Unsalted saltine crackers will become your best friend. Keep a pack in your purse for when your tummy gets upset. Or if the morning sickness stays really bad, there is dr. Prescribed pills that can help:) good luck and congrats!

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Today, while working at Subway I joked with a customer asking him if he was going to order in Spanish. The women in front of him began yelling about how I was being racist and told my manager that I needed to be fired. The customer I was joking with was my Spanish teacher. FML

#21356827
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35097) - you deserved it (2283)

On 02/15/2015 at 5:39pm - work - by anonymous - United States (Georgia)

_kyleG_'s comment : People need to calm the hell down

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Today, my roommate let out a blood-curdling scream in the bathroom. I ran in to see what was going on, only to find her sitting on the toilet, topless. Turned out she'd tried to pierce her own tit using a clothespin and a needle. FML

#21356659
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32712) - you deserved it (2693)

On 02/15/2015 at 12:57pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark

wobbly1's comment : How long has she had a drinking problem?

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Today, my girlfriend confessed to cheating on me. Unfortunately, she's a pathological liar and I can't be sure if it's really true, along with half the stuff she tells me on a daily basis. Love is hard. FML

#21356609
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28755) - you deserved it (9637)

On 02/15/2015 at 11:02am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, once again I tried to convince my dad to stop smoking. And once again, while I was speaking, he lit up a cigarette and smoked until my asthma flared up and I was wheezing so hard that I had to leave the room. FML

#21356583
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32031) - you deserved it (3288)

On 02/15/2015 at 9:52am - love - by =( (woman) - Australia

Today, alone on Valentine's day, I decided to eat chocolate and watch romantic comedies in bed. I had an allergic reaction to the chocolate which sent me to the ER. FML

#21356363
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31287) - you deserved it (3147)

On 02/14/2015 at 11:07pm - misc - by Rubyscooby212 - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. I'm extremely uncomfortable with eye contact, but he kept staring into my eyes the entire time. I had to sing the F.U.N. song from Spongebob in my head to stop myself having an anxiety attack. FML

#21356336
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34663) - you deserved it (4934)

On 02/14/2015 at 10:41pm - intimacy - by jessybear777 - United States (Missouri)

Today, my daughter got her first period. Nobody was home but my husband. He didn't know what to do, except give her a sponge to put in her underwear. FML

#21356191
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35205) - you deserved it (3385)

On 02/14/2015 at 7:34pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, my girlfriend berated me for my "lack of communication skills", all while deeply engrossed with something on her phone. FML

#21356030
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26362) - you deserved it (2360)

On 02/14/2015 at 3:04pm - love - by hopeless - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, my mom's obsession with cleanliness hit a new low when she bitched at me for having trash in my trash can. FML

#21355983
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30518) - you deserved it (2055)

On 02/14/2015 at 2:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my girlfriend wanted to roleplay as a schoolgirl. I was excited, until we started and she asked me to lick her "vajayjay". I cringed so hard, my skull practically caved in. I broke down laughing while trying to explain my cringing. Now she's pissed and I'm blue-balled. FML

#21355947
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28686) - you deserved it (8958)

On 02/14/2015 at 12:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Ireland

Today, I got a text from my mom shaming me for forgetting my sister's birthday. It isn't her birthday today, it's mine. FML

#21355845
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35014) - you deserved it (1834)

On 02/14/2015 at 9:10am - misc - by secret - United States (Connecticut)



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Friday 27 February 2015

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