by Braxam / 06/15/2011 at 12:42pm / United States / Health
by random / 06/15/2011 at 10:23am / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation
Today, I was in my family's hotel room taking a dump. The lock to the bathroom was broken so we had made a deal: when the door is closed, someone is using the toilet. The maid didn't know that. She punched me in the face because she claimed I scared her. FML
by Anonymous / 06/15/2011 at 9:37am / Denmark (Sjelland) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to a concert with my boyfriend. I was repeatedly ass-grabbed, grinded on and hit on by guys. My boyfriend's response was, "As long as they continue to bring you free beer, let them get a little feel of what they are paying for." FML
by unknown / 06/15/2011 at 6:20am / United States (California) / Love
ica0308's comment : at least they find you attractive. and you get free beer!
by James64138 / 06/15/2011 at 6:13am / United States / Intimacy
Sweet121's comment : Go fuck a guy, send him a video of it, and say "Aw, I thought it would turn you on..."
Today, I had a sore throat, and I'd read that drops of Tabasco sauce on your tongue helps. I aimed the bottle at my tongue and the whole cap came off, covering my face and filling my mouth with Tabasco sauce, causing me to blow chunks all over the kitchen floor. FML
by Alec / 06/15/2011 at 5:02am / United States / Health
by MegaBear / 06/15/2011 at 1:46am / United States / Work
by Username / 06/15/2011 at 1:07am / United States (California) / Health
by Username / 06/14/2011 at 10:38pm / United States / Love
rhidiculous's comment : is his name Robin?
Today, I was unbelievably horny so I sent a kinky text message to a boy I really like, only to receive the reply, "Not tonight, I'm raging Minecraft, having a wank, and going to sleep. Try again tomorrow." FML
by Username / 06/14/2011 at 9:17pm / United Kingdom (Lancashire) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 06/14/2011 at 8:59pm / United States (Maine) / Work
Today, like every other day this past week at Bonnaroo, I've been placing my belongings in the cubbyhole inside the portapotties as I use. Today, I also learned that those "cubbyholes" are urinals. FML
by Savannah / 06/14/2011 at 8:07pm / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous
by hatelife / 06/14/2011 at 2:37pm / United States (Ohio) / Love