by Anonymous / 06/25/2011 at 4:39pm / Switzerland (Vaud) / Miscellaneous
Today, my mom insisted on putting sunscreen on me. I closed my eyes and shut my mouth while she rubbed some on my face. Halfway through, I burped. I opened my mouth just in time to get a large glob of sunscreen in it. FML
by Unbearable / 06/25/2011 at 3:58pm / United States (New York) / Health
Today, the man next to me was feeding the birds when he ran out of food. We were at Adventure Island and there were "Do not feed the birds" signs everywhere. The birds then became aggressive and started savaging the both of us. FML
by kk / 06/25/2011 at 3:41pm / United States (Florida) / Animals
Today, while driving with my family, the car got stuck in a large patch of mud. My family of seven decided that I, the fifteen year old girl, would be best suited to push it out. After slipping, falling, and getting completely covered in mud, they finally called a tow truck. FML
by muddygal / 06/25/2011 at 3:10pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Transportation
by woahheylex / 06/25/2011 at 10:21am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
Aim4thebullseye's comment : Shit you got pizza why you mad?
by beekeke45 / 06/25/2011 at 9:39am / United States (New Hampshire) / Kids
sourkrout94's comment : hahah way to go..
Today, my mother won't give me any painkillers for my migraine. She believes that "When medicine goes into your stomach, the acids stop the medicine from working" and that "It's all in people's heads when medicine works". FML
by Live02Dance / 06/25/2011 at 8:58am / United States (Virginia) / Health
by suxx / 06/25/2011 at 4:39am / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy
mojojojo91's comment : Did it feel so good?
by thatguy / 06/25/2011 at 3:47am / Canada / Miscellaneous
by cek4uytp / 06/25/2011 at 2:02am / United States (California) / Love
Today, I sent my romantic interest a sexy text about a dream I had about a "sex gameshow." I sent it by replying to the last text sent. I'm now responsible for traumatizing my 12 year old niece who could only reply, "Like Jeopardy?" FML
by PandaMantis / 06/25/2011 at 12:32am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by yearbook369 / 06/25/2011 at 12:31am / United States (New Jersey) / Love
by yourmomsabitch / 06/25/2011 at 12:30am / United States (California) / Geek