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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, while I was working at a gas station, a man came up to the register with his zipper undone and his penis hanging out in full view. I had to awkwardly hand him his change while trying not to look or make eye contact. FML

#21506054
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20116) - you deserved it (1499)

On 12/20/2015 at 11:24pm - work - by forever damaged - United States (New York)

Today, after quitting my job to take a very attractive position with a competitor, I was told the position was no longer being offered. I'm now on my way to file for unemployment. FML

#21505755
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21068) - you deserved it (3970)

On 12/20/2015 at 5:19am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I started my new job at a small business. I was pretty excited to finally be working, until I found out the big boss is a creeper and sees no problem making comments such as "You're way more interesting than the rest of these slope-eyed fucks." FML

#21505072
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19329) - you deserved it (1523)

On 12/18/2015 at 5:17am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was sucking on a candy and I began choking. A coworker rushed over to give me the Heimlich maneuver. That freed the candy from my throat, and also the shit from my bowels. FML

Today, my grandma was sent to the hospital so I called out of work. My bosses told me that if I didn't come in I would be fired. I did so, only to find out they needed me there so I could close the restaurant while they left early to go to a party. FML

Today, I was at my job as a bagger in a grocery store when I felt the intense need to shit. On my way to the bathroom, an elderly customer insisted I go with her to find an item she needed, despite my telling her exactly where it was and that I was in a hurry. I didn't make it back to the bathroom. FML

#21504421
51 comments

Today, my coworker, who has a tendency to overshare, decided to tell me she has chlamydia. I threw my hands in the air and said, "Stop. I don't wanna know." A customer heard this exchange and we were both written up. FML

#21504186
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20286) - you deserved it (1529)

On 12/15/2015 at 9:21pm - work - by fmltom (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, after working at the same place for 3 years, I found out that they are not only cutting my hours but now I have to take orders from some girl I trained because she was promoted over me. FML

#21503764
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20979) - you deserved it (2520)

On 12/14/2015 at 7:15pm - work - by hatemyjob (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I got a concussion at work. Our resident schizophrenic decided to test how gravity worked by dropping a torch over the bannister directly onto my head. I'm still seeing stars. FML

Today, I was volunteering at a gift-wrapping booth to raise money for autism, and helping others takes my mind off the fact that my mom died at Christmas. While carefully wrapping a present, offering bows, ribbons, and a gift tag, a snobby bitch said to me, "You're not doing a very good job." FML

#21503447
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24458) - you deserved it (1994)

On 12/13/2015 at 10:23pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, while working at a gas station, I accidentally changed the price of gas to 8.9 cents per litre. It took me fifteen minutes to figure out why everyone wanted only two or three dollars of gas. I fixed it, but now my managers are debating charging me for lost revenue. FML

#21502954
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19950) - you deserved it (6614)

On 12/12/2015 at 2:41pm - work - by Ihadnoidea (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I realized that I know, all too well, what it feels like to have my over-middle-age boss's boob on my shoulder. FML

#21502646
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18279) - you deserved it (1620)

On 12/11/2015 at 4:10pm - work - by WeightonmyShoulders (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had my first job interview in months. The guy chuckled mockingly at my master's degree in philosophy and wound up admitting that he had no idea why I'd even been selected to be interviewed. FML

#21502612
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19779) - you deserved it (3432)

On 12/11/2015 at 2:16pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Iowa)



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