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Today, I found out that my roommate secretly edited a paper I wrote and recently turned in, so that it repeatedly refers to the famed author "Kneel Gayman." I'm positive that's not how it's spelled. FML

#20958782
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32671) - you deserved it (2898)

On 11/15/2013 at 3:30pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, while refereeing a soccer game, I was accused of being racist, blind, and a fascist by spectators. The game was played by a group of third graders. FML

#20957478
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35740) - you deserved it (2659)

On 11/14/2013 at 12:21pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was accused of stealing when I dropped a $20 bill in front of my boss. His logic: I'm too poor to have a $20 bill and there's no way it was a tip, since our customers are "so stingy". It was a tip and it was going to get me through the rest of the month. He won't give it back. FML

#20957216
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48737) - you deserved it (2656)

On 11/14/2013 at 2:18am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, one of the special needs teens I work with confessed his love for me. It was cute until he put his erection on my leg and attempted to hump me. FML

Today, I asked a co-worker why he was wearing sandals, as they are not allowed under our strict dress code. He got extremely angry with me and stormed off. Ten minutes later, I got called into our boss' office. Apparently, he told her that I walked up to him and asked to suck his toes. FML

#20956059
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40294) - you deserved it (3539)

On 11/13/2013 at 4:00am - work - by feetfreak (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was taking out a customer's groceries when he offered me a $5 tip. I told him I couldn't accept, since it's against store policy, but thanked him anyway. He called me an asshole just as my boss was walking to his car, who then yelled at me for it. FML

#20955992
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38861) - you deserved it (2635)

On 11/13/2013 at 1:42am - work - by BagBoy (man) - United States

Today, working as a cashier, I had a customer come through and ask to purchase a bag of ice. I asked, "Eight pound or twenty pound?", referring to the clearly marked weight of the bags. He replied, "What's the difference?" FML

#20955463
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34318) - you deserved it (2854)

On 11/12/2013 at 6:56pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, while taking an order over the phone for the customer at work, I began to hear slight moans. The moans gradually became faster and louder, until climax was achieved and I realized I was being used for phone sex. FML

#20955245
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42432) - you deserved it (3415)

On 11/12/2013 at 3:29pm - work - by long day - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was mentioning to a coworker how there was a huge lull today in business. A young coworker then turns to me and says in a snooty tone, "I think you mean a 'lol', it's pronounced L-O-L." FML

#20953649
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42514) - you deserved it (2804)

On 11/11/2013 at 5:36am - work - by shut up. - New Zealand

Today, a drunken customer blindsided me after I told him I would not be giving him a free drink after I watched him put his own hair in it. FML

#20953603
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33453) - you deserved it (2167)

On 11/11/2013 at 3:18am - work - by ShakenNotStirred - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I found out that when you flush an animal clear of blood for research, there is a nerve inside the heart, which when you strike it right, electrical signals cause the animal to writhe as if alive. Now, my boss knows about my fear of zombies, and I'm now terrified of half my job. FML

#20953149
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37121) - you deserved it (4864)

On 11/10/2013 at 8:52pm - work - by kittkatt1 - United States (Michigan)

Today, while working at Chipotle, a teenage girl asked in all seriousness if she "could have a steak burrito, but with like, chicken instead?" FML

#20951236
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42546) - you deserved it (3487)

On 11/09/2013 at 9:15am - work - by fmylyfe (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, a woman accused me of bullying her son, and said that she is going to get me fired. Her son is a 27-year-old teacher at my school, whom I disciplined for showing up drunk. FML

#20950736
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43681) - you deserved it (2282)

On 11/08/2013 at 8:46pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)



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