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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I quit my job because my company wouldn't give me the raise I've been asking for for 2 years. I just saw the ad on Craigslist for my replacement position. The starting salary is above what I was asking for. FML

Today, I finished my project two weeks early. Now I am being laid off because there is no work to do. FML

#3797001
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46096) - you deserved it (3520)

On 07/16/2009 at 8:00am - work - by bowhuntpa (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I realized the extent of my crush on one of my employees. I found myself cropping our picture out of the staff photo to see what we would look like as a couple. FML

#3787096
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16047) - you deserved it (36919)

On 07/15/2009 at 10:08pm - work - by beingthebossisoverrated (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found a website that lets you write an email to yourself from "the past". I used my boss's address, and wrote a long email about how much I hate him, signed from me. It worked, and he'll receive it in 6 months, after I move away. He's already received the confirmation email, though. FML

#3777907
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8397) - you deserved it (52733)

On 07/15/2009 at 4:17pm - work - by Alex - United States (Virginia)

Today, a fax came in at work for a specific job, and I asked the owner of the company who it was for. He replied "the round one", so I handed it to our rotund Project Manager. Apparently the owner meant the garbage can, not my fat co-worker. Now i'm the asshole of the office. FML

#3774043
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17263) - you deserved it (38693)

On 07/15/2009 at 1:24pm - work - by kjcarey123 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I applied for my first job. I didn't know how to write a resume, so I copied and pasted one from someone else and reworked it. I got on the bus, handed it in, and left. Then I remembered I forgot to change the contact info and date. FML

#3743203
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7045) - you deserved it (68568)

On 07/14/2009 at 11:27am - work - by captainfail (woman) - Germany (Bremen)

Today, while I was working as a waitress, I had to wait on a table of 13 people. I was struggling through it and when they finally left I went by the table to pick up my tip. Instead of a money I got a napkin saying "Here's your tip, don't be a waitress." FML

#3729416
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53193) - you deserved it (6227)

On 07/13/2009 at 10:04pm - work - by Nick (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was trying to clean the belt of my register at work at a grocery store. I noticed two strips of rubber stuck in the corner of the belt, and after pulling on them periodically all morning one finally came loose. It was a foot. I had been pulling at a dead rat trapped in the belt. FML

#3675667
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44550) - you deserved it (2782)

On 07/11/2009 at 8:33pm - work - by cashier (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, as I was bent over at my waitressing job an elderly woman walked by and smacked my ass. I looked at her, shocked, and she said, "It was too tempting with you bent over like that, I have a dirty old mind." I didn't know whether to be flattered or horrified. Maybe both. FML

#3661940
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43762) - you deserved it (5882)

On 07/11/2009 at 5:10am - work - by grannysmack (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, while working at McDonald's a car full of obnoxious teens came through. They had made a $30 order, and handed me a tin of small change, claiming that on a McDonald's ad they saw that we, employees, liked counting change. I had to count out $30 in spare change during a rush period at work. FML

#3659409
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50668) - you deserved it (4380)

On 07/11/2009 at 2:28am - work - by Meow (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was at a second interview for a job that I really need as I got laid off last month. Midway through the interview, I went to cross my legs and realized I had 2 different shoes on. FML

#3637305
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33676) - you deserved it (18897)

On 07/10/2009 at 11:08am - work - by unemployed (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boss requested that I re-organize every file in the office, because she wanted the filing cabinets alphabetized right to left, not left to right. To thank me, she came into my office to give me one uncooked ear of corn. I think my boss has mistaken me for some kind of farm animal. FML

#3613617
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45754) - you deserved it (3221)

On 07/09/2009 at 3:17pm - work - by ST3PH (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my laptop plug got stuck in the wall outlet. I stood there for 10 minutes violently trying to yank it out. My boss came in and screamed at me for making noise. I was angry, so I glared at him and yanked on the plug as hard as I could. It dislodged itself noiselessly and I fell over. FML

#3601135
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9798) - you deserved it (37052)

On 07/09/2009 at 1:33am - work - by aireun (man) - United States (Arizona)



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  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

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