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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, my left-handed boss needed PC help. I said "right-click for the menu." She said nothing happened. Three times we went through this. Eventually I went over, asking her to show me what she did. She was using her right hand on the left mouse button. She earns $10,000 more than me. FML

#2798980
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58663) - you deserved it (3022)

On 06/11/2009 at 11:21am - work - by girlfriday (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I had my first appearance in a court as an attorney. I called the prosecution the prostitution. FML

#2796637
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (78007) - you deserved it (21849)

On 06/11/2009 at 7:52am - work - by apav (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I received an email from a temp agency trying to hire me. Suprisingly, it was the same job I was just laid off from after two years of great employment. They were trying to hire me at half my original salary. FML

#2792784
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49002) - you deserved it (2223)

On 06/11/2009 at 1:21am - work - by surfernerd6987 - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was in the cafeteria when I noticed a new worker cleaning a table. As I passed her, she looked up and smiled at me. Thinking she was pulling a funny face, I jokingly crossed my eyes and smiled back. She looked hurt and continued working. Later, she served me my lunch. She was actually cross-eyed. FML

#2774700
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12630) - you deserved it (67823)

On 06/10/2009 at 3:42pm - work - by crosseyed (woman) - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, I busted my ass to help this old lady move her stuff because she was going to a nursing home. I was told I would get paid. When I finished four hours later the lady took me to a room and told me to pick out anything in her little goody bag. I got a race car as payment. FML

#2766394
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47948) - you deserved it (8642)

On 06/10/2009 at 7:03am - work - by person (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I work for a company that sells a leading brand of condoms. They give away free condoms to employees at the office. I haven't gotten laid since I began working here. FML

#2745458
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40888) - you deserved it (6382)

On 06/09/2009 at 3:39pm - work - by IronMonkey (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my temp agency sent me out for an interview for a great job. The interviewer and I hit it off. She asked if I could start later today. She said she'd call after making up a contract. She didn't call. My temp agency called to tell me the interviewer was fired right after my interview. FML

Today, I was playing piano for a wedding rehearsal. Bored, I decided to pass the time playing through a book of music I found in the piano bench. Some time later the bride turns to me and screams at me to stop. I had turned the page and had begun to play "Let's call the whole thing off." FML

#2730448
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10271) - you deserved it (45986)

On 06/08/2009 at 8:14pm - work - by Chipper (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had a meeting at work with my board of directors for a potential promotion. When one of them told a joke, I politely let out an amused snort. Then, I noticed my director's white shirt and tie covered in red splatter. I nose bled all over the director of my company. FML

#2720820
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48162) - you deserved it (4176)

On 06/08/2009 at 2:51pm - work - by Marie (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I came home and found my desk devoid of all paper. Turned out my mom dropped by and wanted to surprise me by cleaning up my work area. She threw away over 7 months worth of irreplaceable original sketches, notes and storylines, thinking they were worthless. My job is a full-time artist. FML

#2701716
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63189) - you deserved it (3263)

On 06/07/2009 at 8:17pm - work - by Kilika (man) - United States (California)

Today, while I was taking a break at work, someone stole my iPod from my desk. I work in a police station. FML

#2654949
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67561) - you deserved it (7574)

On 06/06/2009 at 7:18am - work - by foretwintie (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, at work my arms were full. I needed to get the door open, so instead of pushing the swing door open with my shoulder, I kicked it open with my foot. Right into my manager's face. FML

#2647799
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34140) - you deserved it (10941)

On 06/05/2009 at 11:36pm - work - by hellogoodbye (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was working as a waitress at a wedding. I was trying to clear the tables as quickly as possible and decided to place a half bowl of soup on top of the pile of plates I was carrying. As I was hurrying back to the kitchen I tripped and spilt the soup all over the bride's ivory dress. FML

#2631583
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46970) - you deserved it (23974)

On 06/05/2009 at 1:57pm - work - by badwaitress (woman) - United Kingdom (Newport)



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