Today, I had to deliver pizza to a nudist colony. I got an eyeful of more than I needed to see. FML

by Dlord357 / 11/07/2011 at 9:24am / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, I was so tired that I fell asleep on the toilet, and then had to give my boss a valid reason for why I was late. FML

by Courtney / 11/07/2011 at 1:49am / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, at work, my mouse cursor kept randomly moving all over the screen, and messed up an entire day's attempted work. As I was leaving, I overheard one of my co-workers saying he'd plugged a wireless mouse adapter into my computer, and had been trolling me all day. FML

by tech_support / 11/04/2011 at 12:05pm / Sweden (Vastra Gotaland) / Work

Today, I was fired for the second time in as many days. I received a letter notifying me that I would no longer be working for the company, effective immediately. When I did not attend work the next day, I received a phone call firing me for not turning up. FML

by fired / 11/04/2011 at 12:04am / Australia (New South Wales) / Work

Today, at the nail salon, a Korean woman was making fun of me. I kindly told her, in Korean, that I understood. She kindly told me, in English, that she didn't care. FML

by EunJung / 11/03/2011 at 8:16pm / United States / Work

Today, I gave my boss a nick name. Everyone thought it was funny. Unfortunately "The Troll" was behind me and heard everything. FML

by hatemyboss / 11/03/2011 at 12:13pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Work

Today, I found out that absentmindedly correcting my boss' use of the word "whom" could result in my immediate termination. FML

by LuckyLoser9 / 11/03/2011 at 11:44am / United States / Work

Today, at work I asked a cute, albeit slightly large customer, her name. Being hard of hearing, I thought she said "Porky" and asked her about it. Turns out she'd said Courtney. FML

by Anonymous / 11/02/2011 at 3:12am / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, my license to carry a gun expired because my manager forgot to renew it. As I'm an armored car guard, this is a problem. In order to keep getting hours, my company transferred me to the coin vault. I just finished moving 15000 lbs of boxed coins. By hand. I'm stuck doing this for a month. FML

Today, I locked myself out of my own shop. And I'm a locksmith. FML

by joser6969 / 10/29/2011 at 10:07am / United States / Work

Today, during my fourth solo day working as a meter-maid, I had a vehicle towed for being parked in front of a fire hydrant. The vehicle belonged to the governor. I'm scared to even show my face at work next week. FML

by NoMoreMeters / 10/28/2011 at 8:19pm / United States (Ohio) / Work

Today, I was yelled at by a customer because we didn't have any ketchup packets. I work in a coffee shop. FML

by Anonymous / 10/28/2011 at 1:07pm / United States / Work

Today, while I was at work at a nursing home I was attempting to dress a woman for bed. She popped me a left hook and I had to ask the nurse to look at my jaw. After my nurse said I was okay she asked me to continue getting the woman dressed for bed. She hit me 5 more times. FML

by Anonymous / 10/28/2011 at 1:37am / United States / Work