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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I went to go give my boss a high five for a job well done. I missed his hand and accidentally slapped his ass on the way down. FML

#3201910
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33467) - you deserved it (11209)

On 06/25/2009 at 10:13am - work - by KN (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I lost it on my co-workers about how hard I've been working, picking up everyone's slack with no appreciation, and it was clear that I needed to find a job that actually rewarded hard work. As I went to grab my jacket to leave, I saw a cake and gift card for a cruise on the table, from the staff. FML

#3179534
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12976) - you deserved it (65579)

On 06/24/2009 at 4:44pm - work - by Whoops (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I enlisted for The Navy because my Boy Scout leader encouraged me. He fought in Korea and is a real inspiration. I asked him what motivated him to join The Navy. He said he was drunk and didn't remember joining until he was called up. FML

#3172918
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34803) - you deserved it (9133)

On 06/24/2009 at 12:37pm - work - by ArmyMan (man) - United Arab Emirates (Dubai)

Today, by request from my new boss, I came into work over an hour early to finish some backed-up filing. This seemed like a great opportunity to earn some extra overtime pay. After spending an hour and half filing, I realized I hadn't clocked in for the day. FML

#3170547
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16497) - you deserved it (36751)

On 06/24/2009 at 10:34am - work - by Tottie (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was informed from a fellow employee at a bar that he finally "hit" the boss' wife. I work for my parents. FML

#3168193
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65108) - you deserved it (2533)

On 06/24/2009 at 5:59am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, while reading some chemistry notes I came across the term "solid water". Completely stumped, I asked myself, "What the hell is solid water?" Then I heard my little cousin say "ice." I'm a 4th year science major in university. He still checks the closet for monsters. FML

#3142518
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26309) - you deserved it (77499)

On 06/23/2009 at 10:19am - work - by uneek14 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at work I got told off by my manager for texting while working. Enraged by this, I trash talked her to the new girl at work. The new girl, a.k.a. my manager's daughter. FML

#3137234
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8155) - you deserved it (60698)

On 06/23/2009 at 1:04am - work - by Don't text and work (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I had an interview with IBM. For a week I did extensive research and preparation for the interview. At first the interview was going really well. I was hitting all the marks. Then just as a final casual question she asked with a smile "What does IBM stand for?". I didn't know. FML

#3134533
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34148) - you deserved it (23692)

On 06/22/2009 at 11:34pm - work - by MrZhang (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was cashiering at Target when an old woman came into my checkout line. Her items? Variety pack of pleasuring condoms, a bottle of KY sensual lube, and two colorful thongs. As I'm scanning these, she leans in and whispers, "I love toys." FML

#3129056
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49380) - you deserved it (2930)

On 06/22/2009 at 8:21pm - work - by the_captain (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my boss hired a feng shui consultant for our small office space. I am the only full-time employee besides the owners, and I work as an unpaid intern. My company would rather pay someone to rearrange my desk than pay me to work at it. FML

#3122883
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40406) - you deserved it (3796)

On 06/22/2009 at 4:06pm - work - by Goldo (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I had a job interview with a person named Chris. The entire time I couldn't figure out if Chris was a man or woman. The interview went as good as it could have went. At the end I said, "Thank you very much sir." Wrong gender. FML

#3117868
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39460) - you deserved it (17221)

On 06/22/2009 at 12:18pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was delivering pizzas for my summer job. I got a big order to deliver for a fellow graduate's party. While I was being paid for the order my friend shows up and says "Don't pay him, his parents are rich, he can handle it." Then they shut the door and took off. The bill was $75. FML

#3100953
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49735) - you deserved it (3262)

On 06/21/2009 at 8:37pm - work - by blahpizzablah (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I got myself a cool pair of colored contacts. I was wearing them while at home, so that I'll get used to them. Then I had to go to a job interview. I forgot to take them out. I went to a job interview with zebra-print eyes. FML

#3091991
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9455) - you deserved it (61857)

On 06/21/2009 at 2:37pm - work - by creepyeyes (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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