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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I had my leaving party after work to celebrate getting a new job. 3 people turned up. I'd invited 35. FML

#5720905
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28473) - you deserved it (4838)

On 10/08/2009 at 12:13pm - work - by Dan (man) - United Kingdom (Harrow)

Today, on my break, I decided to be friendly and chat with a co-worker that everyone else always seems to avoid. He spent the next ten minutes telling me all about his abcessing sebaceous cysts. Apparently, "The scars look just like gunshot wounds." FML

#5707882
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25848) - you deserved it (5119)

On 10/07/2009 at 6:36pm - work - by loverofstrife (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was teaching a woodshop class. We were using power tools, including drills, and pieces of pine wood. While helping a kid to hold a piece to practice drilling, he went too far forward with the drill. It went through my hand. FML

#5697763
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46891) - you deserved it (10478)

On 10/07/2009 at 3:05am - work - by screwed (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, after nearly eight months of unemployment, I started a great new job. After seven and a half hours of work, my new boss comes up to tell me what a great job I was doing, but that he somehow forgot to clear the new hire with the company owner, so I'm fired. Hello, unemployment... again. FML

#5675476
17 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33398) - you deserved it (1777)

On 10/06/2009 at 12:06am - work - by perpetuallyscrewed (man) -

Today, my 70 year old coworker gave me a letter telling me he was attracted to me, and wishes to have a relationship in which he can 'hold me in his arms every night'. I'm 21. FML

#5669917
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40997) - you deserved it (2836)

On 10/05/2009 at 8:41pm - work - by Eimii (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was just about to do an important presentation in front of my boss and co-workers. When, without warning I tripped in front of everyone and knocked a VERY expensive computer off the table. How do I know it was so expensive? I'm paying for it. FML

#5667888
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28674) - you deserved it (4492)

On 10/05/2009 at 7:25pm - work - by ProneToBlondeMoments (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was really, REALLY tired at work. I went to the restroom to take a little break, and must have dozed off, because I was awoken by my boss, knocking on the door of the stall. Apparently, I had been snoring. FML

#5661357
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11119) - you deserved it (28889)

On 10/05/2009 at 12:36pm - work - by sleepytime (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I was frustrated at work so to have fun, I wrote an email to myself saying that I was great and loved myself and should relax. I used all different colors and fonts. Instead of hitting "delete", I hit "print" without realizing. My manager got it out of the printer and put it on my desk. FML

#5658558
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8409) - you deserved it (34224)

On 10/05/2009 at 6:49am - work - by Me (woman) - Kuwait

Today, I did a 3 hour long assignment for school. I was bored so I gave it the title "F***ing Assignment for a F***ing Teacher." I went downstairs only to discover that the printer was out of ink. So I sent it to her email, then I realized that I didn't change the title. FML

#5651382
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7971) - you deserved it (52071)

On 10/04/2009 at 9:47pm - work - by BadStuden (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I checked in a group of men from Mexico. I speak just enough Spanish to realize they're discussing my breasts. I have to stand there smiling while checking in three more people. FML

#5618007
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31384) - you deserved it (3437)

On 10/03/2009 at 6:31am - work - by Spanishredhead (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I checked my email for the hundredth time, hoping to hear back from a potential employer about a job I really want. No response. Why? My email with resume attached has been sitting in my Outbox for the past week. I never actually sent it out in the first place. FML

#5612700
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7681) - you deserved it (34119)

On 10/02/2009 at 10:23pm - work - by Unemployed (woman) - United States

Today, I was fired for not attending a mandatory meeting. I confronted my boss and told her I never heard anything about it, she told me that daily reminders had been sent out via email for weeks. She then discovered that she failed to enter my email address in the system. I was still fired. FML

#5607614
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47903) - you deserved it (2390)

On 10/02/2009 at 5:31pm - work - by Rae (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my english teacher asked me why I didn't have my project completed. Thinking quick on my feet I told her it was because my grandmother had just passed away. Apparently they go to the same country club and have known each other for years. My teacher started crying and ran out of the room. FML

#5607225
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7728) - you deserved it (65223)

On 10/02/2009 at 5:07pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



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