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Today, at work, a 3-year-old threw an egg at me from his cart. I couldn't leave my register to clean my hair because it was too busy, so when the new manager came in, he wrote me up for "unkempt appearance." Now my new hire probation period is extended 30 days, and my nickname is "Egghead." FML

#21327516
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31044) - you deserved it (2379)

On 12/30/2014 at 11:38pm - work - by EggHead - United States (Virginia)

Today, my elderly neighbour told me why my other neighbours don't talk to me. I'm a massage/physical therapist and treat clients, mostly athletes, in my home. My neighbours saw the steady stream of young, buff guys coming to my house and concluded that I'm a gay prostitute. FML

#21327463
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33274) - you deserved it (2644)

On 12/30/2014 at 10:34pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, my coworker pointed to our nervous new intern and asked who he was. I jokingly said, "Can't you tell? He's our new slave." I then quickly realized how bad that sounded, given the intern is black. FML

#21327404
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26698) - you deserved it (15652)

On 12/30/2014 at 8:39pm - work - by smooth - United States

Today, I called asking about a job I interviewed for 3 weeks ago. It's a scummy call center where known drug addicts work. They told me I wasn't getting the job. I guess my high school diploma and being drug-free makes me not good enough to work there. FML

Today, I had to deal with numerous complaints about an employee washing their genitals in the communal bathroom sink. Nothing in the HR manual prepared me for this. FML

Today, at the airport, a lady bitched me out for changing her departure gate. She called me incompetent and accused me of "messing with people's lives" by "making them walk." I didn't change the gate, and the other gate was less than 10 feet away. FML

#21325932
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30809) - you deserved it (2062)

On 12/28/2014 at 3:12pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boss sent me a Word document that he wanted me to make into a PowerPoint presentation for him. It was a set of proposals for the board of directors about cost-saving options. The third option was to eliminate my position in the company. FML

#21325772
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29503) - you deserved it (1791)

On 12/28/2014 at 8:56am - work - by HALIFAAA (man) - Germany (Niedersachsen)

Today, my boss sent me a text message saying, "You're fired. Merry Christmas!" FML

#21323895
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31492) - you deserved it (2413)

On 12/25/2014 at 10:25am - work - by CalebNotShomo - United States (Texas)

Today, for my Christmas bonus at work, I got a potted plant and some lotion. FML

#21322774
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26593) - you deserved it (2580)

On 12/23/2014 at 3:58pm - work - by whut - United States

Today, I went to my retail job to buy some clothing. As soon as I walked through the doors, my manager yelled at me for not being in appropriate work clothes. I tried to explain that I was off the clock but he was having none of it. I got written up. FML

#21322497
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33225) - you deserved it (2848)

On 12/23/2014 at 3:14am - work - by I hate my job - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, at work, a customer cried because the cake I made her was not "exactly" the same as the display. I'm the one who made the display and it was the same but the display cake had faded a bit, since it had been there for a month. I'd mentioned this to the customer when she placed the order. FML

#21322284
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27547) - you deserved it (1827)

On 12/22/2014 at 8:21pm - work - by bakerysux - United States (Texas)

Today, I got in trouble for going to work sick. Yesterday, I got in trouble for not going to work while sick. FML

#21322171
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30587) - you deserved it (2155)

On 12/22/2014 at 4:36pm - work - by Mandy - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out I was the top ranking sales person for 2014. What did last year's winner receive? An all-expenses paid weekend holiday. What did I receive? A ham. I'm vegetarian. FML

#21321989
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34436) - you deserved it (3546)

On 12/22/2014 at 9:24am - work - by Bahhumbug (man) - Australia (Western Australia)



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  • It's the weekend so let's plaster on a fake smile and plough through this shit one more time. Sorry, I was channelling Bill Hicks there. I'll start again. Hi everyone, how are you doing? This week…

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