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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, my husband told his parents that he was quitting his job so that he could focus on school. They asked him what he was going to do for money. When I told them that I'd be the one working, they took one look at me and burst into laughter. FML

#21230924
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40776) - you deserved it (3935)

On 08/06/2014 at 12:57pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out my co-workers don't actually like me when they changed the hangout spot after accidentally inviting me. FML

#21230545
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35427) - you deserved it (3265)

On 08/05/2014 at 11:35pm - work - by ditched - United States (Ohio)

Today, I picked up an extra shift at the store. It was also the day the store's ventilation system shut down, resulting in carbon monoxide poisoning for me and two co-workers. FML

#21230314
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38945) - you deserved it (2736)

On 08/05/2014 at 6:44pm - work - by cutthroatkait (woman) - United States

Today, I posted an ad online for house cleaning services. So far, all fifteen responses have been solicitations for sex. FML

#21229459
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34822) - you deserved it (3979)

On 08/04/2014 at 5:54pm - work - by notthenaughtymaid (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was taking an order for a patron at the casino. The policy is to "pay first." After explaining this to him, he still refused to pay. After years of being polite, I finally cracked and said, "You are making this really f-ing difficult". This particular patron was our CEO's son. FML

#21228632
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37623) - you deserved it (12155)

On 08/03/2014 at 6:02pm - work - by really though? - United States (Delaware)

Today, at work, an old man was having trouble using his credit card at the checkout. I told him to "just stick it in", and he replied with "I love it when you talk dirty to me." The whole line at the checkout laughed. FML

#21228111
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49222) - you deserved it (21273)

On 08/03/2014 at 1:16am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I managed to not laugh as a potential high-profile Italian client with a heavy accent repeatedly pronounced "sheet metal" as "shit metal". Unfortunately, my boss and a senior colleague couldn't contain their own laughter. We lost that deal, and our jobs are now endangered. FML

#21227795
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37128) - you deserved it (4560)

On 08/02/2014 at 6:37pm - work - by Shitmetalseller (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, I was rejected by a company I applied to. When I was writing my application, I spent so much time on their website researching that the ads on my browser are almost all for their products. It's like getting rejected again with every click. FML

#21227193
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33743) - you deserved it (3443)

On 08/01/2014 at 11:23pm - work - by heartfelt - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I got suspended from work after getting caught reading a work-related FML. Irony is funny, but it doesn't pay the bills. FML

#21226986
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32301) - you deserved it (15590)

On 08/01/2014 at 6:38pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, a new session started for my swimming squad. I walked down to the pool, tripped over a stray equipment bag, and belly-flopped into the pool in front of everyone, fully clothed. I'm the coach. FML

#21225439
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40298) - you deserved it (4654)

On 07/31/2014 at 1:00am - work - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I got into trouble at work because a customer complained about my face tattoo, I don't have a face tattoo but I do have one behind my ear. Nonetheless, I still got written up and had to cover it with a band-aid, which ripped out hair when I took it off. FML

#21225337
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33604) - you deserved it (9780)

On 07/30/2014 at 11:28pm - work - by heatherfeather22 - United States (Iowa)

Today, I accidentally farted in the middle of class. Thinking I got away with it, I just kept doing my work until some kid across the room says, "I could have done better." FML

#21224311
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35548) - you deserved it (6338)

On 07/29/2014 at 11:49pm - work - by dealtit - United States (Georgia)

Today, while working an early shift, I was dressing a wound on a gorgeous guy, when he laughed and pointed out some granny panties next to me on the floor. I guess I forgot to take yesterday's underwear out of my pants before putting them back on this morning. FML

#21223271
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33797) - you deserved it (8801)

On 07/28/2014 at 4:47pm - work - by dorrisdoes - New Zealand



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