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Today, my boyfriend and I went to the beach. I though he was being really sweet by putting sunscreen on my back as I layed on my stomach. I got home later, and felt that my back was sore. Then I saw the giant penis on my back that been burnt in. FML

#6789121
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33094) - you deserved it (5345)

On 12/17/2009 at 2:57am - work - by Brittanyy_leigh (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was running the drive-thru window at work, when a man pulled up with his dog in the seat next to him. As he was counting out his change, the dog leaned over his hand and drooled all over it. Not only did he pay exclusively in coins, those coins were slimy from dog drool. FML

#6780153
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22566) - you deserved it (2447)

On 12/16/2009 at 4:53pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, a mother and son were in my office. The kid wasn't feeling well and threw up. Mom covered his mouth with her hand, creating a vomit nozzle and covering me in puke. She yelled that I deserved to be sprayed on because I was not quick enough in getting a bucket for her son. FML

#6779433
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33296) - you deserved it (2239)

On 12/16/2009 at 3:43pm - work - by Andy (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, while at work, I was asked if I wanted to leave early. I said no and let my co-worker go instead. Two hours later, I was punched in the face by one of my patients with absolutely no warning or provocation. FML

#6764357
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22416) - you deserved it (3403)

On 12/15/2009 at 1:04pm - work - by psychworker - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I had my six month employee review. My manager said that my attendance was good, and I was exceeding my targets performance wise. My reward, a five cent per hour pay cut. Apparently the rate at which I started is too high to meet their current pay scale. FML

#6762044
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24417) - you deserved it (1736)

On 12/15/2009 at 6:42am - work - by Talvesh (man) - United States

Today, I have to train people overseas to do my job. If I succeed in teaching them what they need to know, then they get my job and I get fired. If they don't perform well, then as the trainer I get blamed, and get fired. FML

#6761187
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33852) - you deserved it (1849)

On 12/15/2009 at 3:30am - work - by ritualdevice - Sent from mobile version

Today, the new guy at work - who is probably at least ten years older than I am - admired the photo on my desk of myself with my husband and teenage daughters and asked "Are those your grand-children?" I'm in my 40's. FML

#6755152
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21818) - you deserved it (2293)

On 12/14/2009 at 8:30pm - work - by Shalamar (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, at work, I watched a man throw up in his hands, dump the contents on his plate, then eat the things it "didn't touch". I had to wash his plate. FML

#6752832
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29008) - you deserved it (1714)

On 12/14/2009 at 3:23pm - work - by militarywife2b - Sent from mobile version

Today, it was my last day at work. I was offered a better job and accepted. Not wanting to leave my present boss hanging, I asked for time to give notice. While I trained my replacement, the owner at the new job had time to think about how slow the season is, and he decided not to fill the position. FML

#6748565
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24739) - you deserved it (3256)

On 12/14/2009 at 3:12am - work - by BadKitty42 (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I had a job interview at the bowling alley. The manager was busy and asked if I could wait. Let's just say I've never bowled before, and I wanted to know how deep the hole was on the bowling ball. The interview ended with him spitting on my finger, trying to get it out. FML

#6739900
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5794) - you deserved it (28176)

On 12/13/2009 at 4:31pm - work - by bowler (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was in a meeting at work. In the middle of our CEO's speech, I farted. Everyone heard including my boss, who looked over and said, "Do you have anything else you wanted to add?" FML

#6708463
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15461) - you deserved it (21236)

On 12/11/2009 at 1:11pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my coworker asked to borrow my nail clippers so he could take care of a hangnail. He went to the bathroom, which I thought was polite, but when he got back to his desk and returned my clippers, there were little curly hairs stuck inside. He's bald. FML

#6695402
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30916) - you deserved it (2715)

On 12/10/2009 at 3:41pm - work - by Hairball (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I didn't get promoted, but the guy who showed up to work drunk a few weeks ago did. FML

#6691372
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29256) - you deserved it (2585)

On 12/10/2009 at 5:38am - work - by Hmmwtf (woman) - Australia (Tasmania)



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