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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, I realized I had misspelled "Education" on all the resumes I've been submitting. FML

#5412403
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9327) - you deserved it (46322)

On 09/22/2009 at 10:12am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I had to cover for my coworker who didn't turn up for work. He is always late for work and I was pissed off about having to cover for him again so I said to my colleagues "He better be either in hospital or dead." Turns out he was dead. FML

#5403982
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33673) - you deserved it (9830)

On 09/21/2009 at 10:06pm - work - by mcdeez (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I got a call from a prominent orchestra asking me to play with them. They were especially interested because I'm still in high school. I called to accept only to find out that my mother had already declined the offer for me because I "only" have a 3.7. FML

#5403553
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39129) - you deserved it (2177)

On 09/21/2009 at 9:50pm - work - by bass (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I decided I would call in sick to work after working 60 hours the week before just so I could have a day off... My body responded this morning with vomiting and diarrhea so I had to call in sick and didn't get to have much fun... Karma 1 Me 0. FML

#5395171
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28490) - you deserved it (9598)

On 09/21/2009 at 3:50pm - work - by sick (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, my grandma picked up the phone. It was a man asking to speak to me. Instead of giving me the phone she decides to hang up on him, thinking it was some guy trying to "get with me." It turned out to be the call I've been waiting all week for... a call from a huge company about a job offer. FML

#5393061
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38216) - you deserved it (2122)

On 09/21/2009 at 1:08pm - work - by Unemployed (woman) - United States

Today, I was working drive thru and took a huge order. When the people pulled around to the window, they handed me a stack of coupons. None of the coupons were even related to what they ordered. They made me change their order to fit the coupons because they couldn't read. FML

#5380714
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32673) - you deserved it (1897)

On 09/20/2009 at 8:38pm - work - by MEW (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was at work and was trying to cheer up my stressed out manager by chatting. We were on the subject of sleeping in when I told her that I loved to be lazy and sleep in when I could. She looked up and down me and then answered, "I can see that." FML

#5368634
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24054) - you deserved it (8956)

On 09/20/2009 at 8:03am - work - by Lazy (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, after being a stay-at-home mom and picking up after my kids for the past 15 years, I got a job rejection letter saying I wasn't qualified. It was a housekeeping position. FML

#5354989
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34498) - you deserved it (3622)

On 09/19/2009 at 5:04pm - work - by HousekeeperNoMore (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was at work, finishing a presentation for my boss. Five minutes after I presented it to him, his boss walked in and asked for the same presentation I had just given. My boss presented it. His boss then turned to me and asked me "what use are you around here?" FML

#5328947
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32683) - you deserved it (1710)

On 09/18/2009 at 7:08am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Iraq (Dhi Qar)

Today, at my work at a designer clothing store, we received a list of photos from the police of known shoplifters. My coworkers were looking at the list saying "Eugh, look at that one: you'd shoplift with a face like that". I walked over and saw that they were looking at a photo of my boyfriend. FML

Today, a professor approached me in the hall to ask if, since I'm a math major, I could tutor one of her communications majors in a required Calculus course. Apparently the volunteer tutor the school provides "is a complete dumbass." I'm the school's volunteer tutor. FML

#5322964
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28891) - you deserved it (3725)

On 09/17/2009 at 10:23pm - work - by bastawhiz (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I pulled someone over for speeding. He was only 10 over the speed limit so I gave him an $84 fine. It turns out he is a workplace Occupational Health and Safety officer and because I wasn't wearing my high visibilty vest while standing on the side of the road he gave me a $250 fine. FML

#5309221
370 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21307) - you deserved it (75879)

On 09/17/2009 at 6:57am - work - by auscop (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, after expressing some of my reservations about the amount of work I have to do to accomplish my thesis on time, my graduate advisor compared my search for knowledge to Tom Hanks' odyssey in the movie "Castaway". FML

#5307387
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19020) - you deserved it (3485)

On 09/17/2009 at 2:15am - work - by Economess (man) - United States (Delaware)



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