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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, at work I asked a cute, albeit slightly large customer, her name. Being hard of hearing, I thought she said "Porky" and asked her about it. Turns out she'd said Courtney. FML

#18136317
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28540) - you deserved it (10313)

On 11/02/2011 at 3:12am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my license to carry a gun expired because my manager forgot to renew it. As I'm an armored car guard, this is a problem. In order to keep getting hours, my company transferred me to the coin vault. I just finished moving 15000 lbs of boxed coins. By hand. I'm stuck doing this for a month. FML

Today, I got into my car after a long shift at work. When I looked in my rear view mirror, a horrifyingly evil face grinned at me from the back window. I leaped out of the car, only to be chased around by two people in clown masks. It turned out to be a prank set up by my co-workers. FML

#18112365
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31776) - you deserved it (3332)

On 10/30/2011 at 3:13pm - work - by Katrin - Norway

Today, I locked myself out of my own shop. And I'm a locksmith. FML

#18102402
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34311) - you deserved it (11477)

On 10/29/2011 at 10:07am - work - by joser6969 - United States

Today, during my fourth solo day working as a meter-maid, I had a vehicle towed for being parked in front of a fire hydrant. The vehicle belonged to the governor. I'm scared to even show my face at work next week. FML

#18098771
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31483) - you deserved it (4681)

On 10/28/2011 at 8:19pm - work - by NoMoreMeters - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was yelled at by a customer because we didn't have any ketchup packets. I work in a coffee shop. FML

#18096319
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29331) - you deserved it (2338)

On 10/28/2011 at 1:07pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while I was at work at a nursing home I was attempting to dress a woman for bed. She popped me a left hook and I had to ask the nurse to look at my jaw. After my nurse said I was okay she asked me to continue getting the woman dressed for bed. She hit me 5 more times. FML

#18094107
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25842) - you deserved it (2488)

On 10/28/2011 at 1:37am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had to sit patiently at the checkout at work, listening to my own father rant about how the twinkies he was buying were "twice the size back in my day", and how "you could buy a dozen of these suckers for just 10 cents." He didn't stop there. No, he tried to haggle over the price. FML

#18092215
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23218) - you deserved it (2267)

On 10/27/2011 at 9:48pm - work - by Angelica (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my boss made me run yet another stupid errand. When I delivered the paperwork to his office, I saw an email printout on his desk. Apparently, he has a plan in the works to get me "fried" next month. I'm not sure whether to give him a letter of resignation or a bottle of barbecue sauce. FML

#18088361
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26727) - you deserved it (2635)

On 10/27/2011 at 12:15pm - work - by last literate - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I was at work when I found an iPhone on the floor. I decided not to turn it into the manager and keep it. Five minutes later, a customer asked if anyone had turned in her missing phone. I said no and began to walk away, when her friend called her phone. It rang. She recognized the ringtone. FML

#18086269
543 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12077) - you deserved it (201385)

On 10/27/2011 at 1:01am - work - by charlie3289 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, at my job as a produce clerk at a grocery store, I had an entire conversation with my coworker about how nice the new cabbage boxes are. This is all it takes to thrill me these days. FML

#18078433
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24861) - you deserved it (3337)

On 10/26/2011 at 2:36am - work - by insanitycalling - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I got a concussion while teaching a kid how to be a safe and cautious swimmer. FML

#18077732
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22644) - you deserved it (4933)

On 10/26/2011 at 12:31am - work - by rowanjusmc - United States (Missouri)

Today, it was my first day on duty as a rookie cop. Everything was going great, and even the veterans on the force were warming up to me. That is until my mother came into the station carrying a brown bag for my lunch. Written on the bag was, "Lunch for my big boy. I love you, pumpkin." FML

#18072512
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40086) - you deserved it (6088)

On 10/25/2011 at 2:46pm - work - by Anonymous - United States



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