Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, while registering at the grocery store, a customer came into my lane with a 100 piece boiled shrimp platter. Feeling hungry, I muttered "nom nom" under my breath. The old man called my supervisor. Apparently I called him a moron. FML

#14266887
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13399) - you deserved it (25993)

On 12/20/2010 at 12:02am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out that being rushed unconscious to the hospital and missing work qualifies you for termination if you don't call in, even if you have a note from the ER doctor. FML

#14246241
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29388) - you deserved it (2017)

On 12/18/2010 at 10:10am - work - by pissedexworker (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, it was my first day as a promoted manager. I got fired for being late. FML

#14242813
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9486) - you deserved it (37019)

On 12/18/2010 at 1:03am - work - by Pouya - United States

Today, my car heater finally died. I deliver pizzas. In Alaska. FML

#14235030
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41040) - you deserved it (3780)

On 12/17/2010 at 12:30pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alaska)

Today, I hit my boss's car. It's only my second day on the job. FML

#14230878
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21413) - you deserved it (9122)

On 12/17/2010 at 12:14am - work - by iswearicandrive (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I was helping a customer when she asked if we were open on Christmas eve. I wasn't sure, so I asked my manager. My manager looked me over and said, "Yes, we will be open. Thank you for volunteering to come in." FML

#14223597
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29340) - you deserved it (3872)

On 12/16/2010 at 12:06pm - work - by adjk90 - United States

Today, I thought it would be funny to hide behind the ice machine at work and jump out randomly and scare people. This resulted in my first victim whacking me in the head with a skateboard. FML

#14222956
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6132) - you deserved it (55168)

On 12/16/2010 at 10:29am - work - by me -

Today, I got a text just before class that my partner didn't finish their half of our 30 page research paper because "That class is stupid". FML

#14213516
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36564) - you deserved it (3749)

On 12/15/2010 at 3:11pm - work - by sam - United States

Today, my boss is being so cheap, he'd rather type in the dark, not fix our water heater or replace our cordless phone because he will not get his bonus if he goes over the budget. FML

#14212061
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24697) - you deserved it (2152)

On 12/15/2010 at 11:16am - work - by blahmylife (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, while giving a brief presentation at work, I blanked out on what I was going to say. I tried to make a joke and tell them I'd had a brain fart, but all I managed to say was "I farted". Well, at least they all laughed. FML

#14211006
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29423) - you deserved it (8009)

On 12/15/2010 at 6:57am - work - by Mike -

Today, I found out that the fat sweaty guy at my job frequently uses my rub-on deodorant and puts it back in my drawer after he's done. FML

#14209126
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31339) - you deserved it (2790)

On 12/15/2010 at 12:27am - work - by anonymous -

Today, I went to a work party where we had a Secret Santa. I gave a nice set of beer bottles with glasses. When my name was called I naturally picked the biggest gift. I got groceries. I now have dog food and men's body spray. I don't have a boyfriend or a dog. FML

#14206849
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9324) - you deserved it (29770)

On 12/14/2010 at 9:18pm - work - by crazygirl - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boss went out for a few hours. My coworkers saw this as an opportunity to take a 2 hour lunch without getting caught. I stayed at the office to answer the phone, while streaming videos which is a big no no. My boss came back early and caught me, they're all still taking lunch. FML

#14202689
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22552) - you deserved it (9400)

On 12/14/2010 at 2:10pm - work - by melly (woman) - United States (Georgia)



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