Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Today, I was at the nursing home I work at, and my boss asked me if I'm serious about my job, telling me that I've been acting strange and not working hard enough. She wants to drug test me. The real reason I'm not 100% is because I have a stomach ulcer from the stress of working there. FML

#14483355
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23309) - you deserved it (2189)

On 01/06/2011 at 7:21am - work - by sick (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was feeling sick but went into my waitressing job because I'd already missed 3 days this week. I was dizzy and managed to spill a tray of drinks all over the customers. Then, when their food was done, I tripped and spilled hot chili all over the man's lap. FML

#14482028
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21093) - you deserved it (10230)

On 01/06/2011 at 1:34am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my cheating ex-boyfriend was offered the job we both interviewed for. I helped him with his cover letter before I found out about the affair. I've been unemployed for almost two years. FML

#14480352
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26173) - you deserved it (3748)

On 01/05/2011 at 10:55pm - work - by sucker (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at work, my computer started acting up. I told my boss I could fix it, but he told me to call the IT department instead. Neither the IT technician or his supervisor could figure it out, so I showed them what was wrong and how to fix it. I was promptly fired for wasting 2 hours of company time. FML

#14475268
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36234) - you deserved it (3729)

On 01/05/2011 at 3:25pm - work - by worksux (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I returned to work after celebrating the New Year in Mexico. I wasn't feeling well, but didn't want to call in sick after already taking a vacation. Now I'm at work with diarrhea, and trotting to the bathroom every 30 minutes. My commute home usually takes around an hour. FML

#14475247
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20405) - you deserved it (5183)

On 01/05/2011 at 3:22pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, while I was out of the office, I'd left my phone charging inside. My boss informed me that since I am clearly running up her electricity bill, it will be deducted out of my already nearly non existent paycheck. FML

#14473900
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22161) - you deserved it (3834)

On 01/05/2011 at 11:41am - work - by x_udontknowme_x (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boss walked in and said something I didn't quite hear, but my co-worker chuckled so to be polite, I laughed with him. They gave me some weird looks. My boss was actually talking about his wife's tumor and my co-worker was coughing. FML

#14471297
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10918) - you deserved it (31053)

On 01/05/2011 at 2:41am - work - by sucks (woman) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, I had a job interview. The interviewer asked me to give 5 adjectives describing myself. I listed 7. The last one being "listener." FML

#14456122
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6362) - you deserved it (32015)

On 01/03/2011 at 10:35pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my boss and I were stacking boxes in the back room of the store. One of the boxes fell and hit me in the face, causing me to lose my glasses. My boss stepped on my glasses as she ran to check the box for broken merchandise, which I then had to pay for. FML

#14453942
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25700) - you deserved it (2208)

On 01/03/2011 at 7:56pm - work - by cain001 (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, after a two week holiday, I'm returning to work exhausted. I had nightmares about work every single night. FML

#14444191
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22230) - you deserved it (3332)

On 01/02/2011 at 9:58pm - work - by sleepy (woman) - Norway

Today, I was in the elevator with my female coworker and a very attractive teen in front of us. My coworker reached out and grabbed the boobs of the teen in front of us, and blamed it on me. I got yelled at, kneed in the crotch, and punched in the face. My coworker couldn't stop laughing. FML

#14416914
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33475) - you deserved it (3403)

On 01/01/2011 at 12:06am - work - by Chris - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had a major falling out with my best friend. Angry, I sent a short text message to him explaining how I felt. I soon noticed I'd accidentally texted "I'm going to fucking kill you, asshole." to my boss instead. I'm still waiting on a reply. FML

#14415862
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8751) - you deserved it (35336)

On 12/31/2010 at 11:05pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boss sent me home from work because she saw me not checking under my customer's cart to see if they had any hidden groceries. I didn't check because the customer threatened to "kick my ass" if I "accused him of stealing" by checking. FML

#14408064
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21053) - you deserved it (7652)

On 12/31/2010 at 10:51am - work - by bad_luck (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #12
  • Another month, another bunch of shitposts. Yes, it's time to delve into the postbag and have another look at the weird and wonderful stuff we've been sent by people from all over the world. Hope you…

Tuesday 3 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: