Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, I had a toothache and applied some numbing gel to soothe the pain. Too much came out and made my whole mouth numb. A man came into my work, thought I was making fun of his lisp, and stormed out really upset. He later called to complain about me. The boss just called me to his office. FML

#13688045
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23486) - you deserved it (3215)

On 11/02/2010 at 1:20pm - work - by speechless (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went back to work after being sick for a week. While I was gone, they hired a new manager. Trying to score bonus points, and possibly a raise, I went to shake her hand and introduce myself. Just as I was about to say "Hello, my name is-" I sneezed right in her face. FML

#13686698
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21541) - you deserved it (5582)

On 11/02/2010 at 10:20am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was cashier at work. The line came to a stop, but there was still people there. I kept saying next, but no one moved. I finally looked over the counter where there was a lady who had been standing there the whole time. She was a midget. FML

#13684047
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34819) - you deserved it (12653)

On 11/02/2010 at 2:20am - work - by saraleerocha - Sent from mobile version

Today, I have a huge meeting with the big executives of the company I work at. I have to be there in 10 minutes. I'm stuck on the toilet with the runs because I thought it would be a good idea to eat hot chicken wings last night. FML

#13674656
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9666) - you deserved it (21766)

On 11/01/2010 at 12:43pm - work - by wtf_fml_0609 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, at school I pulled my bicep muscle arm wrestling. I lost. He was 14. I'm the 23 year old security guard. FML

#13657321
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21228) - you deserved it (8703)

On 10/31/2010 at 12:06am - work - by Disappointed - United States (New Jersey)

Today, at work, I was caught picking my nose, on camera, in an elevator. The security guard stopped me on my way out of the building to tell me how funny it was. FML

#13644556
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8430) - you deserved it (26295)

On 10/30/2010 at 12:12am - work - by mortified (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I overheard a conversation between a coworker and a new employee. The new girl was trying to get familiar with people's names, and she asked my coworker, "Which one is Heather?" He answered, "The annoying one." She said, "Oh, that's Heather." I'm Heather. FML

#13625422
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22214) - you deserved it (7576)

On 10/28/2010 at 10:19am - work - by kaz89 (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I spent all day handing out flyers advertising my services as a psychic. I got only one call. The caller wanted to inform me that I had misspelt the word "psychic" on my flyer. She was right. FML

#13610871
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6016) - you deserved it (36377)

On 10/27/2010 at 1:58am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while at work, I was asked to see my boss. I was informed that the company would be laying off 20 people, and that I was one of them. I was told I could finish off the week, then was sent back to work. Twenty minutes later, my boss walked around and handed us all Christmas party invitations. FML

#13598783
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22414) - you deserved it (2080)

On 10/26/2010 at 2:35am - work - by robthebuilder (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, one of my coworkers called to remind me about the annual costume day at work this morning. I dressed as Pocahontas. There is no annual costume day. I was fired for dressing inappropriately in front of customers. FML

#13595352
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29695) - you deserved it (5960)

On 10/25/2010 at 9:47pm - work - by pocahontas (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I went to my first day of work in over 2 years. As I approached the boss, he asked me what my name was. Turned out they hired the wrong person. FML

#13593951
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26180) - you deserved it (1969)

On 10/25/2010 at 8:22pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was at work, when I got bored and started spinning around in my chair for a little fun. As I was spinning, I went to grab my phone. I missed and sent my phone flying, hitting my coworker in the face. My boss witnessed the whole thing. FML

#13577689
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7047) - you deserved it (32245)

On 10/24/2010 at 3:29pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was selling personalised stockings at work. When handing a customer's order over to her, which had no name on, I joked, "Oooh this is a bit mysterious". She replied, "Actually, it's in memory of the baby I miscarried earlier this year." FML

#13574389
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28819) - you deserved it (9150)

On 10/24/2010 at 9:06am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Staffordshire)



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