Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Today, I spent an hour setting up a delicate display stand at work. Not five minutes later, a woman barged in with her little kid, who immediately went up to the display and tipped the whole thing over. When I called attention to the mother, she just scoffed, "Isn't this your job?" and left. FML

#16299041
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33810) - you deserved it (2907)

On 05/22/2011 at 3:50pm - work - by NoRespect (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, at my hairdressing job, my first client of the day came in for a cut. Her hair smelled awful, and when I asked her why, she informed me that she'd gotten trashed with some friends the night before, and one of them had puked in her hair. She came to me to get it cleaned out. FML

#16271295
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33202) - you deserved it (3267)

On 05/20/2011 at 7:29pm - work - by ewwgross - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while working at a restaurant, an elderly lady stuck my tip in my back pocket as I was walking away. I wish I knew this before I'd thrown her to the floor for touching my hiney. FML

#16268137
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13534) - you deserved it (39600)

On 05/20/2011 at 3:38pm - work - by rioght onnn - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boss scheduled a staff breakfast at a swanky new restaurant for all the hard work we've been doing. The dining area is on the roof, and the building has no elevator. I've been in a wheelchair for 11 years. When I brought this to my boss's attention, he said it wasn't his problem. FML

#16267088
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49083) - you deserved it (3015)

On 05/20/2011 at 1:59pm - work - by jayc80 (man) - Bermuda (Hamilton)

Today, I tore up my airborne academy admission documents because my lab results weren't good enough. A few hours later, they called me to apologize for the misunderstanding, mine turned out to be perfect and they'd accepted me. They need me tomorrow with all the documents to finalize the admission. FML

#16263514
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15387) - you deserved it (37302)

On 05/20/2011 at 3:46am - work - by SkyDiver -

Today, I finally started my dream job. I turned up for work with a huge smile on my face. Imagine how much my face dropped when I saw that I had to share an office with the girl I stood up last weekend. FML

#16251176
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9861) - you deserved it (72690)

On 05/19/2011 at 11:13am - work - by Username -

Today, after searching for a job for over a year now, I finally got an interview. The pressure made me so nervous that I passed out in the middle of it. FML

#16248268
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29971) - you deserved it (5316)

On 05/19/2011 at 1:58am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I got pulled over for going about 88mph. When the cop asked why I was speeding, I replied, "I was trying to go back in time". He didn't like that answer and gave me a ticket. FML

#16248002
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11367) - you deserved it (63654)

On 05/19/2011 at 1:30am - work - by 613tanner -

Today, it was my first day as an animal control officer. My first dispatch was to collect a dog that had been hit by a car. I had to clean up my dead dog on my first day of a job that barely pays rent. FML

#16245376
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52864) - you deserved it (3743)

On 05/18/2011 at 10:48pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, at work, somebody stole my sunglasses. Fed up with the constant theft in my office, I stormed up to my boss, as he had long ago promised to catch the thief. He listened patiently to my rant before pointing out that my sunglasses were on my head. FML

#16235775
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10728) - you deserved it (42922)

On 05/18/2011 at 9:08am - work - by Red-cheeked -

Today, I was wondering why I was getting strange looks all day at work. When I got to a mirror after my shift, I noticed a booger hanging out of my nose, which was visible only when I smiled. My job involves greeting people all day with a huge smile. FML

#16155788
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29346) - you deserved it (5374)

On 05/13/2011 at 8:27am - work - by Smile No More -

Today, I called a possible employer I had an interview with about a week ago to see if I had got the job that I have already been trained for. Her response? "Are you sure I interviewed you?" FML

#16139951
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26354) - you deserved it (2728)

On 05/12/2011 at 2:17am - work - by Username -

Today, I worked 12 long hours cooped up in my office. Before leaving, my boss asked me whether I'll ever take my job seriously. FML

#16129629
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30474) - you deserved it (3006)

On 05/11/2011 at 1:51pm - work - by jamalinho (man) - Bangladesh (Dhaka)



FML's blog

  • JT's illustrated FML
  • Hello everybody, how's it going? This week we're looking at the delicate art of getting along with your neighbours. If you've ever lived in an apartment building, you'll know that having people live…

Friday 22 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: