Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Today, I was attacked by clowns at work. I don't work at the circus. FML

#14894865
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29658) - you deserved it (3320)

On 02/08/2011 at 11:27am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was dry-walling a house when my butt started to itch. I bent over to scratch it on a piece of plywood, at which point the client's wife walked in and asked what the fuck I was doing. FML

#14892103
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8403) - you deserved it (27998)

On 02/08/2011 at 2:58am - work - by Shane -

Today, scarcely having time to look at myself, I quickly got dressed and went to work. Only when I got there and saw my reflection in the bathroom mirror did I notice that the colour and detail of my black lacy bra could easily be seen. I work for a construction company. Full of men. FML

#14882987
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12650) - you deserved it (29394)

On 02/07/2011 at 2:57pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I had no choice but to shake the hand of a customer, who just moments before, had the aforementioned hand down the front of his pants, scratching his snowglobes. FML

#14882108
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28958) - you deserved it (3292)

On 02/07/2011 at 1:04pm - work - by hushnow - United States

Today, while waiting on a customer at a restaurant, I accidentally asked a midget if she'd like a children's menu. FML

#14866852
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19124) - you deserved it (27261)

On 02/06/2011 at 12:53pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, while stocking shelves with canned goods, a kid no older than ten ran down the aisle, knocking down everything in his path. He was followed by his mother who was laughing hysterically. FML

#14840451
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29780) - you deserved it (2430)

On 02/04/2011 at 3:13pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I scraped the ice off my boss's car windows and thought it'd be funny to scrape a swastika in the ice on his roof. I didn't realize until it thawed off that it scratched it into the paint. He didn't find much humor in it and is making me pay for the damage. FML

#14836415
20 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6379) - you deserved it (72244)

On 02/04/2011 at 3:11am - work - by Username -

Today, while waiting for a job interview, a woman sat down next to me and asked if I was here for the job too. Thinking she was also an applicant, I tried to demoralise her, and said the job was going to be a complete joke. With that, she stood up and said, "Do you still want to go into my office?" She was the interviewer. FML

#14826763
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7153) - you deserved it (67561)

On 02/03/2011 at 1:53pm - work - by parker1993 (man) - United States

Today, I spent nearly an hour thawing out my car and driving to work in this stupid freezing rain, only to find out that I'm now unemployed due to budget cuts. FML

#14820715
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27168) - you deserved it (2054)

On 02/03/2011 at 12:05am - work - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, as I was driving to work in the aftermath of a terrible blizzard that came through my area last night, a lady slid through an intersection and hit my car, totaling it. I called my boss and told her what happened, only to have her tell me that we were closed due bad roads. No one told me. FML

#14811839
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26096) - you deserved it (4470)

On 02/02/2011 at 1:22pm - work - by mandapanda (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I woke up at 3am to go to work. This will be my new routine from now on. FML

#14798010
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28801) - you deserved it (9002)

On 02/01/2011 at 3:14pm - work - by yawning - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, a snow storm rolled into my small town, leaving my car stuck under 3 feet of snow. I called my boss to tell her I couldn't drive to work. Her reply? "Walk." FML

#14795725
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29337) - you deserved it (5450)

On 02/01/2011 at 10:40am - work - by Username -

Today, I wrote a 2000 word essay on "Las Vegas - The City That Never Sleeps". I was proud of my work, until someone pointed out that New York is "The City That Never Sleeps", not Vegas. FML

#14793954
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9467) - you deserved it (38023)

On 02/01/2011 at 5:35am - work - by mmaisie (woman) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)



FML's blog

  • FML's badges: pointless but essential!
  • If you're a regular on FML, it probably means that you're a member. Whatcha mean you're not a member? Right, for a start, run along and create yourself an account. Doing so will allow you to comment on…

Monday 23 February 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: