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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I got threatened with a gun through the drive thru speaker because I didn't offer some guy any pies to go with his meal. FML

#19291503
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27288) - you deserved it (3073)

On 03/17/2012 at 12:37am - work - by CDeVeney92 - United States (Texas)

Today, I asked a co-worker if he'd cover for me while I slipped out to cash some money at the bank. When I got back, I found out that when he said "yeah, sure" he actually meant "yeah, sure, I'll tell the boss and get your dumb arse suspended". FML

#19282495
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21484) - you deserved it (12479)

On 03/15/2012 at 12:13pm - work - by davey d (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I got back to work at my hospital after some sick leave. The first jackass to waste my time was a guy with leg lacerations. This, he claimed, was because he tried to break a samurai sword over his leg as part of a bet. It's day one and already I want to kill myself. FML

#19274332
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20885) - you deserved it (6210)

On 03/13/2012 at 10:32pm - work - by Simms (man) - United States

Today, while at work, a man came up to me and screamed that I was the devil's child, pointing at the tattoo on my wrist the whole time. I just stood there while he prayed for my soul. FML

Today, I was working retail when a group of older gentlemen came in looking for a good sound system. I showed them a top-range system and gushed about it in detail, trying to close the sale. One of them snorted and said, "See Dave, girls like her are the reason ball gags were invented." FML

#19268166
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26660) - you deserved it (3867)

On 03/12/2012 at 11:10pm - work - by sandi519 (woman) - United States

Today, on my way to work, I had to squeeze by a man sitting in a large truck parked next to my car. I was in a bit of a hurry and in my rush the collar of my shirt got caught on his grill. My shirt ripped and I flashed the guy my entire boob. FML

#19261756
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28165) - you deserved it (4347)

On 03/12/2012 at 12:28am - work - by titillating (woman) - United States (California)

Today, at work at a gas station kiosk, a man requested a carton of cigarettes. We keep our cigarettes on a high shelf. I'm short and very large chested so I have to jump in order to reach the carton. He said, "I only come here for the entertainment" and left without purchasing his cigarettes. FML

Today, in the locker room at work, someone tried writing "douche bag" on my locker, and misspelled it four times before apparently giving up. FML

#19255450
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25148) - you deserved it (2129)

On 03/11/2012 at 1:39am - work - by The Last One (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that the gnat infestation in my dorm room was not caused by the recent cool weather, but rather the rotten pear I found under my roommates bed. FML

#19245415
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23143) - you deserved it (2429)

On 03/09/2012 at 1:12pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while on trial for a desperately needed new job, I tripped crossing a road with my would-be manager. I twisted my ankle, and he had to carry me across the road and call a taxi for me to go home. FML

#19243809
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23562) - you deserved it (2715)

On 03/09/2012 at 1:48am - work - by Katie (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I accused a student in my class of getting his dad to do his homework. It turns out that his dad died 2 years ago. FML

#19243777
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8147) - you deserved it (55628)

On 03/09/2012 at 1:43am - work - by ITM21 - United States

Today, I received the results of the exams that I re-took in order to improve my grades. I got exactly the same grades as before in all four exams. Point for point identical. FML

#19237669
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16092) - you deserved it (18449)

On 03/08/2012 at 3:06am - work - by stuckonrepeat (woman) - United Kingdom (Hampshire)

Today, I was at a meeting. One of the other members decided to share that their cat had passed away recently. I got an uncontrollable nervous laugh, started crying because I was laughing so hard, and left the room while everyone watched in horror. FML

#19237178
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13826) - you deserved it (21815)

On 03/08/2012 at 12:47am - work - by Honey Badger (woman) - United States



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