Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, I finally got a job interview, and I thought it went amazing. They were supposed to call me today or tomorrow with the news. Today is also the day that my phone company decided to cut my phone off. FML

#10648270
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28362) - you deserved it (4683)

On 05/20/2010 at 12:58pm - work - by goodtiming (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I found out the reason I've been itchy for the last two weeks is because I'm now allergic to chlorine. I'm also a swimming instructor. FML

#10507279
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29162) - you deserved it (2689)

On 05/13/2010 at 1:51pm - work - by Dfacta (man) - United States (California)

Today, I came home after ten hours at work to find my unemployed wife and 4 kids sprawled out watching TV waiting for me to get home and cook for them. I had to wash all the dishes first because they didn't feel like getting up or helping. FML

#10499435
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32739) - you deserved it (6511)

On 05/13/2010 at 12:07am - work - by justkillm3 - United States (North Carolina)

Today, while at work, a woman left her credit card at my register. I tried to return it before she left. Seeing her getting into her car, I jogged after her and yelled, "Wait." She ran over my foot. FML

#10488066
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26068) - you deserved it (2434)

On 05/12/2010 at 4:07pm - work - by ab1e - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was driving home from work when I was pulled over by a cop. She asked why I was being pulled over and figuring she knew I said, "For swerving because of my alcohol problem." I had a broken tail light. FML

#10446068
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5947) - you deserved it (45292)

On 05/10/2010 at 1:28am - work - by drewig - United States (California)

Today, a customer came into the music shop I work in to look at guitars. After calling the customer "Dude," and "Man," numerous times, they stalked off suddenly. When I asked if everything was okay, they responded with, "I'm female, you asshole!" FML

#10044709
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8846) - you deserved it (28366)

On 04/21/2010 at 4:29pm - work - by Z88 - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, I got through to the phone interview stage for a great job. When the phone rang, I answered and suddenly, spontaneously, burped really loudly. The interviewer hung up. FML

#9396047
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18804) - you deserved it (7559)

On 03/26/2010 at 5:44am - work - by urrrppp (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, my mom told me that she doesn't want me to help any of my friends get a job at the restaurant I work at. Apparently, she thinks that they would do a better job than me and get me fired. FML

#9181946
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18024) - you deserved it (2951)

On 03/18/2010 at 7:15am - work - by son (man) - Israel (Tel Aviv)

Today, I was working, ripping siding off a house. I pulled off a sheet that was over my head. I got rained with what I thought was woodchips that was behind the siding. Turns out they were dead grasshoppers. Guess what I found in my bra after work. FML

#9178637
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24687) - you deserved it (2919)

On 03/18/2010 at 1:45am - work - by xUnluckyx - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I applied for my job, while working at my job. I hope they hire me. FML

#9171908
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18823) - you deserved it (5084)

On 03/17/2010 at 10:12pm - work - by TheSuregeon (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, while at work as a lifeguard, an older gentleman who comes in almost every morning wearing a very tight swimming suit, came up to me and said, "I don't want you having any erotic fantasies of me." After a long pause he added, "Actually, I wouldn't mind it if you do." FML

#9161234
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30130) - you deserved it (3392)

On 03/17/2010 at 3:32pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I tried an herbal tea that is supposed to increase your milk supply (I'm a breastfeeding mom). Well, it worked, and it kicked in at my office, but only on one side. So when I went into the bathroom, I noticed I had one boob WAY higher and bigger than the other. Great. FML

#9156670
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23923) - you deserved it (4242)

On 03/17/2010 at 10:18am - work - by mama75 (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)



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