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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, my car broke down and had to be towed to the dealership. Normally, this would be just unlucky but I work with kids and we had been fundraising for charity. I am now sitting at the dealership with my hair coloured purple, red and blue and in ridiculously high pigtails while people stare. FML

#19687715
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21678) - you deserved it (2443)

On 05/27/2012 at 9:20am - work - by straightlyconfused - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I got fired from my job at a weight-loss center because I was too skinny, and apparently it's too depressing for the customers to handle. FML

#19677400
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27584) - you deserved it (3620)

On 05/25/2012 at 7:18am - work - by jingle - United States (Delaware)

Today, my grandmother told me my favorite top had a permanent smell of BO, despite my constant deodorant use. I wear the top to work just about every shift. I now realize all the weird little comments my coworkers have made are actually hints to go take a shower. FML

#19677033
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8946) - you deserved it (26957)

On 05/25/2012 at 3:07am - work - by emliv12 - Australia (Victoria)

Today, during a workplace safety exercise at work, I managed to cut off the tip of my thumb. FML

#19673015
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20460) - you deserved it (3773)

On 05/24/2012 at 2:26pm - work - by thwack - United States

Today, I went into my classroom to find a bag of shit on my desk with a note saying, "Thanks for failing me b*tch!" FML

#19670939
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25391) - you deserved it (7272)

On 05/24/2012 at 12:59am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I was to give a presentation to several of my company's senior employees. The moment I stood up, I accidentally let rip a monstrous fart that lasted a good two or three seconds. When I tried to utter an apology, I clammed up and let out a whiny grunt. They were not amused. FML

#19668387
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24223) - you deserved it (4875)

On 05/23/2012 at 4:38pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I went to orientation for college. They gave us a name tag and I tried to figure out how to put it on for a few minutes. After struggling with it I realized it was a sticker. FML

#19665526
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7292) - you deserved it (28290)

On 05/22/2012 at 11:27pm - work - by CollegeKID - United States

Today, my colleague yet again misused the word "literally." It's driving me insane. I have to work opposite him and hear him say things like he's just "literally shit himself inside out." FML

#19656531
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22676) - you deserved it (4984)

On 05/21/2012 at 10:11am - work - by Rebecca (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while volunteering at a local homeless shelter, I asked the woman next to me how long she'd been homeless. She works there. FML

#19655540
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22188) - you deserved it (10213)

On 05/21/2012 at 1:28am - work - by HomelessGirl1 - United States (Nevada)

Today, I woke up early for an important team meeting I needed to attend. I washed, got changed, and sat down to eat breakfast... I then woke up again, an hour late and covered in cereal. FML

#19645294
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23863) - you deserved it (4309)

On 05/19/2012 at 4:03am - work - by themcdave - United Kingdom (Bedfordshire)

Today, I sat down on a chair after my very large boss sat on it all day. When I got up, my pants were damp. FML

#19640975
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26176) - you deserved it (2600)

On 05/18/2012 at 7:49am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I started my job as one of those sign spinners. About an hour later, some people drove up, yelled, "Bitch, get off my corner," and threw water balloons at me. My boss made me keep working in the soaking wet outfit. FML

#19637949
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23350) - you deserved it (2494)

On 05/17/2012 at 6:02pm - work - by poseidon5213 - United States (California)

Today, I found out that I am allergic to grass, and not supposed to mow lawns. My job is mowing lawns. FML

#19630951
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26296) - you deserved it (2260)

On 05/16/2012 at 3:36am - work - by jobless - United States (Massachusetts)



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