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Today, my boss sat me down to discuss the sounds my co-workers have heard coming from my cubicle. Apparently my music sounds like the background tracks from shitty soft-core porn movies. I'm getting a three day suspension while they go through all my files. FML

#17343796
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27212) - you deserved it (4723)

On 08/02/2011 at 1:47pm - work - by ImScrewed (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was in a cinema watching a movie to review in the local paper. Suddenly, the guy behind me leans in and starts whispering and hissing "Do it... Do... It. DO IT" for the rest of the movie. I'm still not sure what he wanted me to do, but he did smell of vomit and had a tea-cosy on his head. FML

#17338822
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23424) - you deserved it (2433)

On 08/02/2011 at 12:43am - work - by Username - Australia

Today, at work I was talking to a co-worker about what a slacker my manager was, and how all she did was stand around and talk. She was standing behind me the whole time. I now have sore nuts due to a direct hit from a broom handle. FML

#17323826
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9135) - you deserved it (30165)

On 07/31/2011 at 8:07pm - work - by MikeMorin18 - United States

Today, I have to take medicine that gives me painful, violent farts. Tomorrow, I have to either get fired or go work in an office that's dead silent. How silent? Last week I heard my coworker drop a paperclip, three desks away. FML

#17305922
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36743) - you deserved it (3154)

On 07/30/2011 at 2:58am - work - by Tootie (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, while working at Kohl's this woman came up to me and asked if I was Native American, I said yes, she then says "Oh! I thought you guys went extinct." This is the country I live in. FML

#17297056
328 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44867) - you deserved it (3525)

On 07/29/2011 at 11:18am - work - by crazygirl12 - United States (Missouri)

Today, after being recently laid off at work due to "cutbacks", I went job searching around town. During my drive, I cruised past my old workplace and saw a "now hiring" sign in their window. FML

#17289297
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33192) - you deserved it (3638)

On 07/28/2011 at 6:25pm - work - by jellymoon14 - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I got into an argument with a militantly feminist co-worker of mine. She threw several vulgar insults at me and debased the entire male gender before storming off. I'd only asked if she needed help while she was doing a crossword. FML

#17284232
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31360) - you deserved it (4784)

On 07/28/2011 at 6:51am - work - by Rick - United States (Indiana)

Today, a bunch of guys at work chased me down a corridor with a Febreze spray for smelling like I'd been "sleeping in a hollowed-out horse's carcass" and having "the personal hygiene of a billy goat." FML

#17283766
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9224) - you deserved it (51410)

On 07/28/2011 at 4:15am - work - by Champion the wonder horse - United States

Today, while I was at work, a co-worker watched while some kid stole the radio out of my car. FML

#17282726
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26790) - you deserved it (2346)

On 07/28/2011 at 12:34am - work - by cocokiss410 - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was directing traffic at work during one of the hottest days of the year. Not only do I have to stand in the heat and exhaust fumes for minimum wage, I also had to endure people asking me "Aren't you hot?" as they drove past me in their air conditioned cars. FML

#17233240
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30416) - you deserved it (3326)

On 07/23/2011 at 8:01pm - work - by Sarah - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I accidentally asked a one-armed man which arm he wanted me to take blood from. He asked for a different nurse. FML

#17207535
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14813) - you deserved it (45016)

On 07/21/2011 at 7:35pm - work - by ohmygosh - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I had a completely normal work day. Other than the fact that my boss dressed up like the lead singer from KISS and hit us with a foam sword at random. My boss is 49. FML

#17176050
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28581) - you deserved it (6246)

On 07/19/2011 at 11:19am - work - by Bill Harrison - United States

Today, I was at work when someone came in asking me to brush their pet shih tzu. After an hour of vigorously grooming through the multiple knots, I called the owner to collect their dog. When she got here she said, "Oh, did I say brush? I meant shave." FML

#17164804
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30482) - you deserved it (2601)

On 07/18/2011 at 3:40pm - work - by StudMuffinette (woman) - United States (Texas)



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