Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, my cousin got hired after six days of job-hunting. I graduated from university six months ago and haven't even scored a single interview; he's a deadbeat junkie who just got out of prison after doing time for armed robbery. FML

#21484001
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26243) - you deserved it (2671)

On 10/24/2015 at 11:39pm - work - by (man) - United States

Today, a customer at my coffee shop bitched me out because we don't sell cranberry juice. FML

#21483612
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21444) - you deserved it (1669)

On 10/23/2015 at 11:06pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my classmate went into rage mode and cursed at me, complaining how it's so unfair that I'm allowed to wear a hijab in class but she isn't allowed to wear a Flamingo hat. FML

#21483299
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26282) - you deserved it (6064)

On 10/23/2015 at 4:17am - work - by idontmakethedresscode - United States (California)

Today, while on a walk during lunch, I urgently needed to pee. Not thinking I could make it back to the office, I slipped into some bushes to relieve myself. As I was going, I looked to the side and saw two coworkers staring back at me. They were having sex, and I'm there with my dick out. Awkward. FML

#21483245
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25545) - you deserved it (3565)

On 10/23/2015 at 12:05am - work - by Embarrassed ass. (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I'm in my third week at a new job. Using an online service our company recommends, I accidentally downloaded a virus that is now working its way through our website, randomly sending our customers Viagra ads via our email. I personally had to tell the founder of the company. FML

#21482325
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21899) - you deserved it (3984)

On 10/20/2015 at 8:15pm - work - by He Hates Me... - United States (Utah)

Today, two women came into my place of work, complaining loudly that they couldn't afford a £3 course fee because they didn't have any money to spend on themselves. They were holding large Starbucks coffees. FML

#21482148
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21902) - you deserved it (1368)

On 10/20/2015 at 9:39am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, at my prestigious sous chef job, I was preparing to plate up expensive entrees for a function of 150 people. After arriving to work 2 hours early to finalize finishing touches, they call the restaurant 5 minutes before their booking stating, 'We can't be bothered anymore, sorry.' FML

#21481906
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24333) - you deserved it (1420)

On 10/19/2015 at 6:13pm - work - by Chefinblack (man) - Australia

Today, my financial situation is so dire that I tried to steal toilet paper from work. I got caught. FML

#21481830
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24567) - you deserved it (5432)

On 10/19/2015 at 2:04pm - work - by PoorGal (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, after submitting my college application, I noticed that I mistyped "math enthusiast" as "meth enthusiast". FML

#21481486
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24658) - you deserved it (7495)

On 10/18/2015 at 3:18pm - work - by RIPcareer - United States (Maryland)

Today, I tried to make a move on the cute guy who sits opposite me at work. In theory, I was going to start a game of footsie with him. In practice, I screwed up and managed to yank his computer's power cable out. He lost his unsaved work. FML

#21480774
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19903) - you deserved it (16017)

On 10/16/2015 at 2:04pm - work - by Namaslayed (woman) - India (Maharashtra)

Today, I walked into the restroom at work to see my boss standing at the urinal, pissing like a toddler. He had his pants around his ankles, ass fully exposed. Now I'm never going to be able to take anything he says seriously. FML

#21480714
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22583) - you deserved it (1665)

On 10/16/2015 at 9:31am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I got turned down by my dream job because their rival company happens to be called my exact name. I'm now known as "The Spy". FML

#21480450
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22606) - you deserved it (1412)

On 10/15/2015 at 4:44pm - work - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Richmond upon Thames)



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