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Pinksheepmeep's favorite FMLs

Today, my brain decided to go into suicide mode. So far I've managed to open a fridge door into my face, walk balls-first into the corner of a table, and sliced my finger while trying to cut open some thick plastic packaging with scissors. I'll probably be dead by the time this is posted. FML

By FMyBrain - / Friday 6 June 2014 21:26 / United States - Fairbanks

Today, I had so much to do, I didn't know where to start. So I didn't. FML

By Anonymous / Friday 1 June 2012 14:29 / Austria - Vienna

Today, I downloaded an application that notifies me when my phone is fully charged. I had no idea how it actually functions, but I plugged the charger in and went to bed. A couple of hours later, I woke up to a man's voice screaming, "I can't take it anymore!" I nearly wet myself. FML

By scaredshitless - / Saturday 3 March 2012 13:55 / Finland

Today, a fax came in at work for a specific job, and I asked the owner of the company who it was for. He replied "the round one", so I handed it to our rotund Project Manager. Apparently the owner meant the garbage can, not my fat co-worker. Now i'm the asshole of the office. FML

By kjcarey123 - / Wednesday 15 July 2009 17:24 / United States

Today, my friend was picking on me at school by constantly tapping on my shoulder. At recess I had enough. I felt the familiar tap on my shoulder, and I drove my elbow into what I thought was my friends stomach. It was my Principal. FML

By da man - / Wednesday 11 February 2009 11:38 / Canada