About Mallik Not specified
Mallik - Followers
Mallik - Followed
Mallik's page visits
Hugged!
Mallik's FML badges
  • Profile completed

    You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
  • Mobility

    You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
  • Up and coming moderator

    It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
  • Consolation prize

    Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
  • 50 favorites

    Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!
    2%
  • Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

    You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    0%
  • Keen reader – Level: master ninja

    You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    0%
  • Keen reader – Level: student ninja

    You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    1%
  • The return of the thumb

    You have thumbed 5000 comments.
    0%
  • The thumb strikes back

    You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
    0%
  • A new thumb

    You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
    1%
  • I agree, my mouse works.

    200 "I agree" votes is a good start.
    9%
  • YDI Master

    You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.
    7%
  • Judgmental

    You have voted "You deserved it" over 100 times.
    33%
  • One more and it's business time

    You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.
    0%
The list of badges to find
Mallik's favorite FMLs

Today, I discovered how startling it is to wake up by having your cat springboard off your face. The intended prey? Two fornicating geckos on the ceiling. FML

By JukeboxValkyrie - / Thursday 16 February 2012 07:52 / United States

Today, before I went to bed, I watched a terrifying movie with zombies. I woke up with a headache, a bloody nose, and my mom standing over me frantically asking me what was wrong. Apparently I had been "fighting the zombies off" in my sleep and had been punching myself in the face. FML

By fearofzombies - / Thursday 13 August 2009 18:17 / United States

Today, one of my three-year-old twin daughters asked, "Dad, can we get a cat?" I replied in a gentle dad voice, "No, honey, dad is allergic to cats. That means they make him sneeze and sniffle. So we can't get a cat. Sorry." After a slight pause, the other asked, "When you die can we get a cat?" FML

By TwinDad - / Thursday 14 May 2009 15:24 / United States

Today, I was walking to class with my roommate. She didn't notice the car coming up behind her because her headphones were in. As I pulled her out of the way, she thought I was goofing around and shoved me back... in front of the car. I got hit and rolled off the hood. FML

By Anonymous - / Thursday 7 May 2009 19:11 / Italy

Today, in math class we were learning about gravity. To demonstrate my teacher asked me to stand on the desk and then step off. Upon stepping on the desk it curved inward and cracked. Everyone was dying of laughter. Fuck gravity. FML

By systeminitiated - / Saturday 2 May 2009 04:55 / Canada