About Lincolnkite
I am just a college kid, living each day to the fullest. I like to read FML's and laugh.
Lincolnkite - Followers
Lincolnkite - Followed
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Lincolnkite's FML badges
  • It's in the can!

    Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
  • Night owl

    You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 a.m.
  • Mobility

    You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
  • Back from the party

    An FML submitted between 5 and 6 a.m. can't be very good.
  • Up and coming moderator

    It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
  • Consolation prize

    Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
  • 50 favorites

    Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!
    42%
  • 100 kick-ass comments

    100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
    51%
  • Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

    You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    0%
  • Keen reader – Level: master ninja

    You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    0%
  • Keen reader – Level: student ninja

    You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    0%
  • The return of the thumb

    You have thumbed 5000 comments.
    0%
  • The thumb strikes back

    You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
    1%
  • A new thumb

    You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
    3%
  • 50 quality comments

    Clicking to reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried afterwards is even worthier.
    50%
  • Who’s the fairest of them all?

    This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
    33%
  • I agree, my mouse works.

    200 "I agree" votes is a good start.
    1%
  • YDI Master

    You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.
    0%
  • Judgmental

    You have voted "You deserved it" over 100 times.
    1%
  • One more and it's business time

    You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.
    0%
The list of badges to find
Lincolnkite's favorite FMLs

Today, whilst reading all 15 pages of this site, my French girlfriend asked me over my shoulder for translations, such as "What is buttsex?", "What is wanking?", and "What means farted?" FML

By james / Sunday 14 December 2008 13:14 / United Kingdom

Today, I had to put up with a student who stubbornly insisted that King Solomon was, in fact, a Pokémon. FML

By madden2014 - / Thursday 19 September 2013 22:23 / United States - Los Gatos

Today, my future father-in-law showed everyone a picture of his poop because it was "shaped like a banana." My fiancé's whole family thought it was funny and "looked more like a banana than last time." FML

By Anonymous - / Thursday 2 May 2013 15:04 / United States - Houston

Today, my boyfriend of 2 weeks said that he was going to cook me dinner. After waiting for the frozen pizza that he decided to make for me to be completely cooked, he said, "Oh I hate this part", reached into the oven with his bare hands and took out the pizza, all while screaming. He is 24. FML

By Anonymous - / Thursday 11 April 2013 15:42 / United States

Today, I woke up with my face covered in blood. Turns out that yesterday at my colleague's birthday party, I got so drunk that I started yelling "Nappy time!" before falling out of my hammock and face-first onto the concrete ground. FML

By nosey - / Monday 8 April 2013 19:20 / United Kingdom - Mountain Ash