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  • Up and coming moderator

    It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
  • I'm an early bird, but no worm yet

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  • Keen reader – Level: master ninja

    You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
  • 50 favorites

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  • Keen reader – Level: student ninja

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  • Mobility

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  • Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

    You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    0%
  • The return of the thumb

    You have thumbed 5000 comments.
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  • The thumb strikes back

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  • Beginner

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    20%
  • I agree, my mouse works.

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    3%
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  • Judgmental

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    17%
  • 50 quality comments

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  • A new thumb

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    2%
  • 100 kick-ass comments

    100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
    2%
  • One more and it's business time

    You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.
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Laynepuls's favorite FMLs

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. In the entrance way I felt a slight tugging on my jeans. Used to my Doberman tugging when he wants to play, I shoved hard with my foot. I successfully punted their Chihuahua off the ground and into the next room where it landed with a thud. FML

By I think its dead - / Tuesday 15 January 2013 07:33 / Canada - Brandon

Today, I was sitting cross-legged, idly jerkin' the gherkin. I guess I got slightly carried away, because I zoned out, forgot where I was aiming, and came all over the side of my face, up my nose and into my eye. FML

By SamWGovan - / Sunday 9 December 2012 16:57 / United Kingdom - London

Today, during a conversation, my boss said, "What, what?" Before I could stop myself, I replied, "In the butt." FML

By whitecollar / Wednesday 5 December 2012 02:43 / United Kingdom - Scarborough

Today, my pregnant girlfriend gave me back the ring I'd used to propose with a week ago. Her reason? She only said yes because she was worried the real father of the baby wasn't going to stick around. FML

By Anonymous - / Wednesday 5 December 2012 10:52 / Australia - Brisbane

Today, I dutifully attended my husband's local gig at a coffee shop. I thus found out, through song, about my husband's affair, in front of about 100 people. All of whom we both know. FML

By leannez - / Wednesday 5 December 2012 05:35 / Canada - Abbotsford