About Jpaigelandry
Hmmmm...... what to say..... Oh! I'm a happily married army wife. I like reading, writing, laughing and enjoying the little things in life while we're still living. I hope you find what your looking for on my little profile. :) Good day or night: whatever the case may be.
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Jpaigelandry's FML badges
  • It's in the can!

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  • Who’s the fairest of them all?

    This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
  • YDI Master

    You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.
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  • I agree, my mouse works.

    200 "I agree" votes is a good start.
    19%
  • One more and it's business time

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Jpaigelandry's favorite FMLs

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

By offbeans - / Tuesday 17 February 2009 02:29 / United States

Today, I tried to get my boyfriend to roll over while he was asleep. He snores loud enough to wake the neighbors and if he lays on his side he usually stops. Instead of rolling over, he stuck his leg in the air, farted twice, and laughed about it in his sleep. He's still snoring. FML

By no sleep for me / Tuesday 8 January 2013 07:44 /

Today, just like every morning this month, I woke up, put on my clothes, looked out my window, and was pointed at by a man in a ninja outfit on my neighbor's roof. The police still can't find him. FML

By Targeted / Friday 9 November 2012 04:54 / United States - Kirkland

Today, I said "bless you" to a nice man who sneezed on the subway. That nice man has now followed me home and stood outside my apartment complex for two hours, claiming to be my "soulmate." FML

By prettylady? / Sunday 28 October 2012 04:22 / United States

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. It was going well until she started talking dirty, saying stuff like, "You like my tushy, baby?" "I want to fellate you so bad," and "You'll need some ice after this one." My boner practically retracted into my body. FML

By ugh - / Tuesday 31 January 2012 00:25 / United States