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  • 50 favorites

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  • I agree, my mouse works.

    200 "I agree" votes is a good start.
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Hermittheekco's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend told me that he may have an STD. When I asked who he was with before me, and where it might have come from, he listed off almost every single one of my friends. FML

By Anonymous / Tuesday 5 March 2013 18:57 / United States

Today, my boyfriend ripped my panties trying to get them off. Not off me, off himself. FML

By nopanties - / Monday 4 March 2013 05:11 / United States - Durham

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. When he was about to orgasm, he screamed "Yes Brittany!" at the top of his lungs. My name's not Brittany. That's his sister. FML

By caroline - / Friday 6 February 2009 15:29 / United States

Today, my boyfriend started coming onto me, despite me being on my period. He said it was okay, and we went to his bedroom. He told me to spread my legs as he spread his hands. Thinking it'd be sexy, I did. He then yelled, "I AM MOSES! I PART THE RED SEA!" and broke down in laughter. FML

By RedWaters / Wednesday 6 March 2013 20:20 / United States

Today, my psychopathic ex-girlfriend spray-painted "Free Candy" on the side of my van, knowing damn well I have to park it in front of an elementary school on a daily basis to pick up my daughter. FML

By cjw / Wednesday 6 March 2013 00:07 / United States