About Hannahbanana434
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Hannahbanana434's favorite FMLs

Today, on our third date, my date tried to get me drunk and kept trying to touch me up. When I said he was moving too fast, he sighed and soon left. Just minutes later, he posted on Facebook saying "Just got friendzoned -_-". One of his friends commented: "I hate bitches, man." FML

By drop dead single - / Saturday 22 November 2014 13:44 / United States

Today, my boyfriend broke the bed pretending to be a caterpillar. FML

By tine / Sunday 16 November 2014 09:44 / Australia - Sydney

Today, I got the, "It's not you, it's me" speech for the third breakup in a row. I'm beginning to think that they may not be entirely telling me the truth. FML

By swiggityswooty / Wednesday 23 July 2014 04:09 / United States - Los Angeles

Today, I was driving my 7-year-old daughter to school, when out of nowhere a bird smashed into the windshield. Instead of screaming or being traumatized by the gore like me, my daughter started laughing, eventually calling the bird a "stupid bastard". FML

By Anonymous - / Friday 27 June 2014 20:22 / Spain - Valencia

Today, I was watching last week's episode of The Walking Dead with my girlfriend. When the gang leader explained the rules of the group to Daryl, I reached over, grabbed my girlfriend's boobs and yelled, "Claimed!" She shot back, "Yeah, they are. But not by you." FML

By the other guy? - / Saturday 29 March 2014 21:57 / Australia - Perth