About Forrestgump14
I currently have a boner
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Forrestgump14's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at the dentist getting a cavity filled. As she's drilling into my tooth, I feel the drill slip, and then she quickly stuffs gauze into my mouth. She nervously laughs and says to me "Wow! You must really be numb!" FML

By Noname - / Friday 6 March 2009 22:20 / United States
By poopsthegame / Monday 3 December 2012 07:36 / United States - Honolulu

Today, my five year old daughter was watching cartoons on TV. Then a Barbie commercial came on. My daughter sang along with the theme song "Be who you want to be, B-A-R-B-I-E." She then turned to me and said "Mom, I want to be a hooker." FML

By ....... - / Tuesday 23 June 2009 17:56 / United States
By badmom - / Wednesday 10 June 2009 18:09 / Canada

Today, I had a very intense sexual dream that made me come and left me panting when I woke up. It was the best orgasm I'd ever had. The trouble was, it wasn't about a hot girl, or anything sexy. It was about bacon. FML

By wtfdreams - / Sunday 17 May 2009 12:33 / United States