About Cuntfused
I'm black and I like white men. So, I rock. :) [email protected] (Save the bs, I don't want to read it.)
Cuntfused - Followers
Cuntfused - Followed
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Cuntfused's FML badges
  • Beginner

    You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
  • It's in the can!

    Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
  • Consolation prize

    Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
  • Mobility

    You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
    0%
  • The rules are the rules

    Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by Alan, our moderator.
    0%
  • Work is a 4-letter word

    Voting on an FML in the "Work" category on a Monday morning between 8 and 9 a.m. How ironic.
    0%
  • Tell us what happened next

    You've commented on an FML that you sent in
    0%
  • My diary is a collector's item

    There were only 100 numbered VDM diaries for 2011/2012. I've got one.
    0%
  • The thumb strikes back

    You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
    0%
  • The return of the thumb

    You have thumbed 5000 comments.
    0%
  • Keen reader – Level: student ninja

    You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    1%
  • Keen reader – Level: master ninja

    You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    0%
  • Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

    You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
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  • Socialite

    You used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
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  • I moderated this!

    In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
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  • Up and coming moderator

    It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
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  • Profile completed

    You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
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  • 100 kick-ass comments

    100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
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  • A new thumb

    You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
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  • 50 quality comments

    Clicking to reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried afterwards is even worthier.
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  • 50 favorites

    Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!
    2%
  • Tweet, tweet

    You have shared 20 FMLs on Twitter, your followers love you and we understand why.
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  • Judgmental

    You have voted "You deserved it" over 100 times.
    4%
  • YDI Master

    You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.
    1%
  • I agree, my mouse works.

    200 "I agree" votes is a good start.
    3%
  • Perfectionist

    Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.
    0%
  • One more and it's business time

    You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.
    0%
The list of badges to find
Cuntfused's favorite FMLs

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

By offbeans - / Tuesday 17 February 2009 02:29 / United States

Today, I attended the wrong funeral. I spent twenty minutes trying to hide and walk away without being too conspicuous. FML

By Arlbethere - / Friday 25 February 2011 12:18 / United Kingdom

Today, the sweetest thing my boyfriend ever told me was that I'd make a good porn star. FML

By PlayboyBunny - / Saturday 19 February 2011 07:20 / United States

Today, I was so lonely, I wound up talking for two hours to the creep who calls my number every Friday night and makes creepy obscene breathing noises on the other end of the phone. Turns out he's a better listener than my husband. FML

By Anonymous - / Saturday 19 February 2011 06:17 / United States

Today, I found out that my boyfriend cheated on me with my best friend. I texted her and I would never talk to her again. But I accidentally sent it to my other best friend, who responded, "I'm so sorry, I never meant for you to find out". My two best friends cheated with my boyfriend. FML

By Anonymous - / Saturday 12 February 2011 05:19 / United States