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Chtychtybngbng's FML badges
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  • Work is a 4-letter word

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Chtychtybngbng's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a text from an unknown number saying, "You shouldn't be eating that." I was eating a piece of chocolate, cheating on my diet. FML

By LucidNightmare / Sunday 27 January 2013 05:38 / United States - Englewood

Today, while making dinner I cut my finger badly with a knife. When I yelled for my dad to drive me to the hospital, he accused me of lying to get attention. He had to taste my blood before he decided it wasn't red-colored corn syrup. FML

By Anonymous / Monday 14 January 2013 05:52 / United States - Seattle

Today, as per usual, my mother went to see her psychic, who told her that one of her children is harbouring a "dark secret". Now we're all grounded until one of us confesses our obviously non-existent secret. FML

By daughter of a gullible cunt - / Sunday 13 January 2013 21:02 / Australia

Today, I opened the door to go out for groceries. Lying on my doorstep was a pile of poop. A piece of paper was taped to the ground beside it that read, "Do it again and you'll get more than dog shit." I don't have the slightest clue who I pissed off, or how. FML

By fucking mafia or what?? - / Saturday 12 January 2013 22:02 / United States - Marysville

Today, my 17 year old boyfriend's mother bought him a giraffe onesie. He refused to take it off and insisted on wearing it everywhere we go. We live in Australia and it's our summer now. So far he has passed out 3 times in public because he over heated, but he still won't take it off. FML

By GiraffeLover / Friday 11 January 2013 11:36 / Australia