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    You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
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  • The return of the thumb

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  • 50 favorites

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    98%
  • Who’s the fairest of them all?

    This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
    33%
  • I agree, my mouse works.

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    3%
  • YDI Master

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  • One more and it's business time

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The list of badges to find
Briannachipman's favorite FMLs

Today, I was eating ice cream and I noticed some on my jeans so I wiped it off with my finger and licked it. It was bird shit. FML

By #201 - / Thursday 5 February 2009 13:23 / United States

Today, I tried to get my boyfriend to roll over while he was asleep. He snores loud enough to wake the neighbors and if he lays on his side he usually stops. Instead of rolling over, he stuck his leg in the air, farted twice, and laughed about it in his sleep. He's still snoring. FML

By no sleep for me / Tuesday 8 January 2013 07:44 /

Today, my boyfriend grabbed my boob, shook it savagely, and shouted "Earthquake!" FML

By Ape - / Monday 17 December 2012 23:12 / United States

Today, I saw my crush at the grocery store. He saw me and started walking towards me. I got so excited that I farted when he came near. FML

By Anonymous - / Monday 17 December 2012 00:58 / United States

Today, I have a cold. I can't begin to count how many times I've sneezed throughout the day, but I can count how many times I've sneezed so hard that I've peed myself: twice. Once while I was at work helping a customer, the other while sitting on the couch next to my boyfriend. FML

By meranda_johnson / Thursday 13 December 2012 08:58 / United States