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Blondeblonde1994's favorite FMLs

Today, I surprise my girlfriend by turning up at her flat on her twenty-fourth birthday. She gets up from the couch as I enter and I shout: "Tonight, my cock is going to stab you twenty-four times!" (Okay, that's not smart). That's when her father glances over from the couch and greets me. FML

By Mateo / Sunday 14 December 2008 03:58 / France

Today, I got a call from my parents' divorce lawyer. When I answered the phone, she thought I was my mother and told me the details about my parent's divorce. I'm a 13-year-old boy who sounds like a woman and just learned that my parents are separating. FML

By madaskueuchiha - / Saturday 8 August 2009 03:57 / United States

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me at the zoo. With a Ring Pop. He was serious. FML

By Cococautly - / Saturday 4 July 2009 04:49 / Canada

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. Everything was going great until I noticed a small blinking light on my shelf. It turns out that it was a camera. My mom put it there to make sure I cleaned my room. She saw the whole thing. FML

By Anonymous - / Friday 26 June 2009 01:00 / United States

Today, I had a hour long conversation with someone I apparently was friends with a few years ago. I couldn't remember who he was for the life of me, so I just played along. Finally, I told him I didn't remember him. He had the wrong number. I had a long conversation with a wrong number. FML

By lostintellct - / Monday 11 May 2009 04:46 / United States