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  • Mobility

    You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
  • A new thumb

    You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
    0%
  • Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

    You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
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  • Keen reader – Level: master ninja

    You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
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  • Keen reader – Level: student ninja

    You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
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  • The return of the thumb

    You have thumbed 5000 comments.
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  • The thumb strikes back

    You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
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  • I agree, my mouse works.

    200 "I agree" votes is a good start.
    2%
  • YDI Master

    You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.
    1%
  • Judgmental

    You have voted "You deserved it" over 100 times.
    6%
  • 50 favorites

    Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!
    30%
  • One more and it's business time

    You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.
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Bamarox13's favorite FMLs

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

By RC3Welly - / Monday 9 March 2009 22:58 / United States

Today, since I hadn't eaten and was about to have a three hour class, I bought Panda Express. I sat opposite my classroom to eat. Soon after I started eating, a wad of saliva dropped into my bowl, and I heard someone yell "BONUS POINTS!" from the second floor. FML

By Sir_ND_Pity / Monday 11 March 2013 19:57 / United States - Fresno

Today, I lost a bet with my friends. I had to go to the super market and buy a copy of 50 Shades of Grey along with a cucumber. The cashier was trying so hard not to laugh while ringing me up. FML

By Anonymous - / Thursday 21 February 2013 13:43 / United States - Boise

Today, I went shopping with my two-year-old nephew. He threw a tantrum in the middle of the store because I would not show him my "boobies". A man came up to us and said I should do what my nephew wanted. FML

By Lesser - / Sunday 17 February 2013 08:02 / Australia - Glenfield

Today, I had my gallbladder removed. I have a very painful incision in my belly that makes any kind of movement excruciating. I've had the hiccups 5 times so far. FML

By IHeartBlueJay / Friday 8 February 2013 05:31 / United States