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Aliasanonymous's FML badges
  • The thumb strikes back

    You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
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  • The return of the thumb

    You have thumbed 5000 comments.
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  • Keen reader – Level: student ninja

    You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
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  • Keen reader – Level: master ninja

    You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
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  • Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

    You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
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  • One more and it's business time

    You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.
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Aliasanonymous's favorite FMLs

Today, after spending the night hanging out with a beautiful girl we start to walk back to my place. Halfway there she turns and says, "I wish you were a vampire" and goes back home. FML

By Hallllo - / Monday 11 May 2009 05:12 / United States

Today, I took my mom out to a fancy restaurant, and spent close to $300 on her Mother's Day present. Later, my little brother drew her a card with crayons on pink construction paper. She cried. He is 20 years old. FML

By Jess-zee - / Sunday 10 May 2009 20:42 / Canada

Today, I flew to see my long distance boyfriend who I haven't seen in 6 months. Upon seeing me, he ran up to me, picked me up and swung me around like they do in the movies. In doing so, my foot hit a 4 year old child who was running past and knocked him out. FML

By airport - / Sunday 10 May 2009 18:49 / United States