About Absolutemaze
*Caught between two cultures. *Trapped in my head. Je ne suis pas de nature violente, je suis un être d'amour et de lumière (tout ça, tout ça...), but let's just be blunt here, sometimes I could just beat someone up with a pillow-case filled with butcher chains ! But I don't :) Un jour je serai accro à Twitter et je me mettrai à parler uniquement en hashtags : #EnKiffSurMaPP #TeamVeuxMonBAC #LesMecsQuiFontDesMouvementsDeSourcilsFTW Ce n'est probablement pas vrai, mais j'ai la profonde conviction que j'ai une voix incroyable. Ceux qui m'entendront chanter sont donc priés de me laisser vivre dans (et pourquoi pas entretenir) mes chimères et mon entêtement. Merci bien :) Guys really need to learn how to cook goddammit !!! If you can cook I'm all yours, really !
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Absolutemaze's FML badges
  • Beginner

    You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
  • I moderated this!

    In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
  • Multitasking

    You found out about the FML Forum, and checked it out.
  • Socialite

    You used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
  • Back from the party

    An FML submitted between 5 and 6 a.m. can't be very good.
  • Mobility

    You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
  • The rules are the rules

    Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by Alan, our moderator.
  • Work is a 4-letter word

    Voting on an FML in the "Work" category on a Monday morning between 8 and 9 a.m. How ironic.
  • Checking you out

    You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
  • So, what happened next…

    You commented on a published FML that you'd submitted.
  • Happy month-versary

    You seem to be glued to FML. Shall we set a tent up for you to sleep in?
  • This isn't what should be happening

    You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done, wrong turn. Go back.
  • Keen reader – Level: master ninja

    You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
  • I’m your new creative director

    You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.
  • Keen reader – Level: student ninja

    You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
  • Up and coming moderator

    It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
  • Perfectionist

    Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.
  • Profile completed

    You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
  • It's in the can!

    Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
  • A new thumb

    You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
  • I NEED to know!

    You went as far as reading the terms of use. You’re a total FML completist.
  • Censored

    Not one, not two, but 50 pages of the Intimacy category read. No comment.
  • Consolation prize

    Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
  • 50 favorites

    Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!
  • Tweet, tweet

    You have shared 20 FMLs on Twitter, your followers love you and we understand why.
  • Who’s the fairest of them all?

    This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
  • I agree, my mouse works.

    200 "I agree" votes is a good start.
  • YDI Master

    You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.
  • Judgmental

    You have voted "You deserved it" over 100 times.
  • Happy ending

    Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
  • One more and it's business time

    You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.
    0%
  • Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

    You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    30%
  • Gandhi

    You have 200 followers. Everyone follows you. You should watch your mouth.
    1%
  • I'm a rock star

    You have 100 followers. Your head's in the game.
    1%
  • Tommy Wiseau

    You have 50 followers and we quite frankly don't know how you managed it.
    2%
  • The return of the thumb

    You have thumbed 5000 comments.
    1%
  • The thumb strikes back

    You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
    2%
  • Picture this FML

    You left your mark on an illustrated FML’s presentation blog article.
    0%
  • I liked to the power of 20

    You've liked 20 FMLs, and your Facebook friends are going to like the FMLs you liked.
    0%
  • My name is, my name is, my name is... Slim Shady?

    You took your first steps inside the chatroom. Welcome!
    0%
  • Tell us what happened next

    You've commented on an FML that you sent in
    0%
  • 50 quality comments

    Clicking to reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried afterwards is even worthier.
    0%
  • Star of the Forum

    With over 3000 messages posted on the forum, you certainly seem to be opiniated.
    0%
  • 100 kick-ass comments

    100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
    17%
The list of badges to find
Absolutemaze's favorite FMLs
By Clamizi - / Friday 17 January 2014 17:52 / France - Bouguenais
By miaou / Thursday 16 January 2014 15:45 / France
By Anonyme - / Saturday 2 November 2013 21:44 / France - Strasbourg
By Mangezmoicuit - / Saturday 2 November 2013 12:00 / France - Pessac
By BobyPingouin - / Thursday 31 October 2013 18:06 / France - Igney