About Vampireking
I'm in the US Army, love to work on cars, and where I live one of the only pass times is partying nonstop :). Message me if you want to.
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Vampireking's favorite FMLs

Today, it's 2:23 in the morning, and my drunken girlfriend has just rung me up from a party where she's the only girl there. She seems to be having a great time. FML

By Clader / Wednesday 10 December 2008 03:09 / France

Today, my parents bought a new car with the money they made from selling mine. To make up for selling my car without telling me, they let me choose the make, model, and colour of the new car... which I just found out I'm not allowed to drive. FML

By Anonymous - / Saturday 27 February 2010 16:01 / United Kingdom

Today, a guy at work told me to, "Relax, dude", All. Day. Long. FML

By Herman / Thursday 25 February 2010 00:57 / France

Today, I realised my girlfriend is the perfect woman for most men. She only ever talks to me in the intermissions on Modern Warfare 2; shame it's not me playing. FML

By sadf4x0r - / Wednesday 24 February 2010 17:27 / United Kingdom

Today, I was having sex with a girl. While we were fooling around, she started squeezing my cheeks and told me I remind her of her son. FML

By Brett meek / Friday 19 February 2010 07:41 / Canada