About Smokeyplague
I wrote this while taking a shit lmao but im a normal dude with a crazy life i work make airplane parts for boeing not much really goes on in my life but work and sleep lol
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Smokeyplague's FML badges
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  • Work is a 4-letter word

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  • One more and it's business time

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Smokeyplague's favorite FMLs

Today, I shaved my pubic area for my fiancé. He told me it looked "like Frodo tried to hack off Gandalf's beard with Gimli's ax." FML

By dancekat - / Monday 8 April 2013 09:17 / United States - Puyallup

Today, my 16-year-old son convinced my 14-year-old daughter that she wasn't allowed to use the ladies bathroom at the shopping centre, because she wasn't wearing a dress like the girl on the sign. He told her girls in pants always used the other one. She believed him. This is my legacy. FML

By badparent - / Monday 8 April 2013 04:26 / Australia - Southport

Today, I was at University when a giant mascot started walking in my direction. As they walked past, they whispered my name seductively. I still don't know who it was. FML

By confused / Sunday 7 April 2013 14:51 / Australia - Glen Waverley

Today, I was walking out of my girlfriend's house with her when I saw her thong drying on the rack. I picked it up, sniffed it and put it on my face as a joke. She replied with, "Those are my mother's." FML

By Anonymous - / Wednesday 16 January 2013 05:52 / United States - Sacramento

Today, while I was having sex, he stopped, looked at me all seriously and said, "Permission to climax, ma'am?" FML

By Anonymous - / Monday 14 January 2013 17:58 / United States - Arlington