About Smoked_bacon
Hello, I'm Alice. I play guitar, bass, ukulele, piano and drums. I like The Who, The Beatles, Sleeping With Sirens, Pierce The Veil and other bands like that. My favourite band is Blink-182. I love DC and Marvel. My favourite film is Back To The Future. I have a cat called Tarzan and a bearded dragon called Zukie. My favourite animals are sloths When I'm older I'd like to be either a herpetologist or teach zoology.
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Smoked_bacon's FML badges
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  • The rules are the rules

    Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by Alan, our moderator.
  • Work is a 4-letter word

    Voting on an FML in the "Work" category on a Monday morning between 8 and 9 a.m. How ironic.
  • Checking you out

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  • Happy ending

    Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
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  • This isn't what should be happening

    You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done, wrong turn. Go back.
  • Who’s the fairest of them all?

    This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
  • I agree, my mouse works.

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  • YDI Master

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  • Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

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    39%
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    37%
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    15%
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  • One more and it's business time

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Smoked_bacon's favorite FMLs

Today, I started doing it again. I'd given up for years, but when I saw the pack I just couldn't help myself. One taste was enough to make me finish off the whole pack. Nobody knows that I've fallen off the wagon and I'm so ashamed of myself. Today, I began eating my cat's biscuits again. FML

By Aliiiice - / Tuesday 16 July 2013 13:18 / France - Offranville

Today, I found an invisible ink pen. I drew on my arms, thinking nobody would see it. I had an allergic reaction to the ink, and I now have three very large, very visible, red penises on my forearm. FML

By maturity / Monday 8 April 2013 00:30 / Australia - Sydney

Today, my older brother walked in on me while I was wearing nothing but a bra, panties, pantyhose, and high heels. I'm his little brother. FML

By SayCheese / Tuesday 2 April 2013 22:52 / Canada - Prince George

Today, I was chatting with a co-worker, and she mentioned she has trouble swallowing pills. I replied that I'm lucky, because I have next to no gag reflex. Half the guys at the other registers abruptly went silent, and I'm now being constantly hit on. FML

By Anonymous - / Thursday 28 March 2013 20:56 / France - Sainte-savine

Today, I got so drunk that I tasered myself in the balls as a joke, fell down my friend's porch stairs and rolled out into the street. FML

By anon / Monday 25 March 2013 18:31 / United States