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Opt911's FML badges
  • 50 favorites

    Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!
    100%
  • The thumb strikes back

    You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
    0%
  • The return of the thumb

    You have thumbed 5000 comments.
    0%
  • Keen reader – Level: student ninja

    You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    24%
  • Keen reader – Level: master ninja

    You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    8%
  • Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

    You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    4%
  • One more and it's business time

    You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.
    0%
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Opt911's favorite FMLs

Today, I had sex with a girl who cried out as she came "Forgive me Lord! Forgive me Lord!" FML

By chicochico / Friday 19 December 2008 16:05 / France

Today, my five year old daughter told me that while I'm at work, daddy has his wrestling buddy Melinda over. She also said that they wrestle on the bed so that they won't get hurt. FML

By abercrombieef - / Thursday 27 August 2009 23:57 / United States

Today, I was driving past a farm that always has 4 chickens walking around outside. It always cheers me up to see them, but I couldn't find them. I wasn't watching the road so I didn't see when I ran over all 4 chickens. FML

By chickenlover - / Thursday 27 August 2009 20:53 / United States

Today, my mother told me I should think about quitting school. She explained that the reason was because she didn't want me to be more successful than my older sisters. FML

By Kitty_Gem - / Thursday 27 August 2009 20:28 / United States

Today, for my birthday, my mom presented me with a $4,000 check to pay for my braces. I've been very self-conscious about my teeth for years. Everyone applauded and told me how happy they were for me. Later, my mom asked me for the check back. Apparently it was just meant to make her look good. FML

By crookedteeth - / Thursday 27 August 2009 17:23 / United States