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Ninjaturtlexxx's favorite FMLs

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. I was sad, but the only thing my mom could say was, "You should have waited until I got him to mow the lawn." FML

By Anonymous - / Tuesday 11 March 2014 13:04 / Israel

Today, I was waiting at the bus stop and noticed a girl that I played netball with. I ran across the road to meet her and she ran across the car park to meet me. We hugged and looked at each other slowly backing away as we both realised that we didn't know each other. FML

By Anonymous / Tuesday 11 March 2014 00:26 / United Kingdom

Today, my mother decided to tell me about how my twin brother almost killed me in the womb when his cord wrapped around my neck. When she left the room, he said, "You won't be so lucky next time." FML

By Anonymous / Saturday 8 March 2014 23:13 / United States

Today, I asked my boss for a few days off next week, because my grandmother passed away yesterday and I'll need to travel to attend the funeral. His response: "She's dead, you're not. You want time off, then quit." FML

By GLHan - / Friday 7 March 2014 22:31 / United States - Commack

Today, my mother asked me why her new airsoft gun wasn't working. I explained to her that it doesn't actually shoot air, it requires pellets too. She looked at me like I was too stupid to be her son. FML

By Drizztreri / Wednesday 5 March 2014 00:09 / United States - Imperial